


Fatherhood of a Cop

by Irish_Winchester



Category: Supernatural RPF
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hurt Jensen Ackles, Hurt/Comfort, Past Child Abuse, Protective Jared Padalecki
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-19
Updated: 2018-02-03
Packaged: 2018-03-18 16:29:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 30
Words: 37,795
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3576180
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Irish_Winchester/pseuds/Irish_Winchester
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Okay, so here's the deal– Jared is a police officer, a rather good one, in NYC. He's had many one-night stands, but never one to settle down, always worried if he did, someone could use it against him in his job. Well, turns out, Jared has himself a son... Jensen. This is gonna be a wild ride for the both of them. Can jared step up to fatherhood? And can Jensen trust his dad? Or is he a lie like everyone else?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Jared sighs, shutting the door to his home. Living outside of New York City, was, in better terms, a pain in the ass some days. But Jared never regretted it; it kept him safer than he would be in an apartment building downtown, or in the city. The man toes off his shoes, setting his firearms on the small table by the living room, and heading up the stairs, into his own room. 

Living alone since he moved out there, Jared didn't need a very big place. Wasn't married, and currently wasn't seeing anyone worth a second call. Sure, one night stands were always good, and sometimes the occasional girlfriend, but never more than three days. Most of that fell on Jared, though; he didn't trust anyone. And not trusting anyone-especially the old criminals he's arrested that are now out on parol, and hate his guts- meant that Jared also didn't like getting close to people. Didn't suit him. Not anymore. 

The last person he'd been with, and meant something to him, was a young woman named Darcie. She'd been supportive of his job choice, which, at the time, was a man in training, and never expected anything super grand. Darcie seemed like the perfect girl, and Jared had even thought of buying a ring. 

But he hadn't known. And because he didn't know, Jared paid the price for it. Darcie Reed was just the beginning of the end. Of why Jared Padalecki didn't trust anyone. 


	2. Chapter 2

At work the next day, Jared has a visitor. Well, more like an interrogator. Considering a woman in a clean cut pantsuit and briefcase held tightly in her left hand, poker face intact, and a fierce flash of determination in her eyes barges into his office after knocking once; and not waiting for the answer.

   "Uh.. can I help you ma'am?" Jared stammers, watching the woman sit in the chair in front of his desk, setting the briefcase on his desk, and quickly opening it up, setting paper after paper down in a pile.

  "Are you Jared Tristan Padalecki?" she asks, and Jared nods, slowly. _What is this chick playing at?_

  "I am Sandra McCoy; I work for CPS," _Child Protection Services? What do they want..._

  "Mr. Padalecki, let me get right down to the point," she says, sitting straight, and folding her hand in her lap, staring right at Jared while she does. Gulping, Jared sits up as well. This lady might be shorter than him by a lot, but that doesn't make her any less intimidating. He waits for her to continue.

  "Sir, it appears that you have a thirteen year old son. He's in need of a home, and we found that you're a good possibility," she speaks slow and careful, like explaining something to a child. Jared just stares at her, as if he's waiting for the punch line. When it doesn't come, the man swallows, looking at the woman in shock.

  "What? I can't have a kid... I've never, and I mean... how the hell do I have a kid?!" he exclaims, and Sandra sighs, leaning forwards a bit to make better eye contact.

  "Well, I don't know, but apparently you do. And what I do know is that he's in need of a home, and you're a valid chance," _Son_ , Jared thinks. _It's a boy, I have a son._

  "What happened to his mother?" he asks, and Ms. McCoy suddenly goes tight-lipped; as if to say, _I have no authority to tell you that_. Jared is still reeling; _I have a son? What's his name? Does he look like me? Who's his mother? Or past guardian? What happened to them? What if_ -

  "Mr. Padalecki, are you willing to give parenthood a shot? I'll give you two months with the boy, and, if he seems to have liked living with you, having positive words about you, he can stay with you if you want him to. But if you don't want him, we have a few good families looking for a boy like him," Swallowing, Jared nods slowly. Sandra beams- or at least Jared thinks that's what it is- and hands him a packet of many papers.

  "Call and give me an answer by tomorrow night," she says seriously, before letting herself out of his office. The police officer watches her go, and the second she's out the door, people are coming into his area; wanting the story. Chad Michael Murray, also Jared's partner, is the first one to barge in. He's soon followed by Genevieve Cortese, their trauma therapist, Chris Kane, the sketch artist and detective. And last but not least, Eric Kripke. Kripke is the boss; and a damn good one, as well. He doesn't take much shit from anybody, but has some understanding when it comes to emergencies and whatnot.

  "Jeez, Jared," Chad starts, ignoring Jared's growl of annoyance when he sits on the desk. "What? Didn't call her back?" Chad grins, and Genevieve rolls her eyes, muttering 'idiot' under her breath.

  "She said she was from CPS... Jared, what did she say after that?" The small office is suddenly silent; only a few shared glances to another person being the way of conversing. Getting off of his shock, Jared looks at everyone in the room, thinking. Never one known for his patience, Chris springs forward, snatching a paper from the desk before Jared can protest. Eyes skimming over the words on the page, blue eyes suddenly rise to meet Jared's.

  "You have a son?" Well, the office is _full_ of noise after that. Chad leaning forward on the desk, trying to find out who he fucked without a rubber, Genevieve asking what he looked like, and is he was anything like Jared, Chris still waiting for the absolute confirmation, and Kripke standing there, looking around, before-

  "Shut up, all of you!" Kripke bellows, and the small room goes silent again. Letting out a sigh, Jared looks to Chris.

  "Yes. It appears, that I have a son," before the room can get loud again, Jared holds out a hand.

  "Whether or not I'm gonna take him in.. Is yet to be determined," he murmurs, and suddenly there's a brunette with huge serious brown eyes staring right at him. Being the only woman in the force at this precinct, Gen knew she couldn't let anyone give her shit, let alone let their hormones get the best of them. So this man, saying he might not take in his own son, was something Genevieve needed to fix right the hell now.

  "What do you mean, 'has yet to be determined'?" She asks, and the other men take that as their cue to leave. Even Kripke knows not to mess with Cortese when she's like this. Swallowing, Jared can only stare at her as she starts the speech that everyone knew was coming.

  "Why wouldn't you want to take him in? He is your son! Flesh and blood, same DNA!" Now Jared didn't really know about that DNA thing, but even if it was wrong, he wasn't going to try to correct her. He liked the way his body was, thank you very much.

  "Gen, I just don't know if I'd really want-"

  "Don't you finish that sentence, Padalecki," Genevieve warns, and Jared quickly shuts up. Sighing, the therapist leans against the side of the desk, looking into hazel eyes.

  "Jared, this could be good for you. You live out of the city, alone,"

  "Hey! I have Harley and Sadie," he protests, but deep down, he knows it's true. It's never more than one night stands nowadays. And sometimes... Well, yeah; Jared can admit sometimes he gets a little lonely. But this is the life he chose, and even if he did want company, Jared doesn't really think that a thirteen year old boy is going to be much help. What are kids that age even in to nowadays? Gen puts a gentle hand on his arm.

  "Just think about it, Jared; having a son might be really good for you. And you know we'll all be around to help you out," Quiet 'duhs' and confirmations come from the doorway, where Chad, Chris, and a few other people on the force are standing. Jared stands, smiling at the petite woman in his office.

  "All right; I'll think about it," Genevieve squeals with excitement. "That doesn't mean I'm saying yes!"

\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Jared says yes. He spent most of the night thinking about it, and then next morning he called off, at Chad's convicning, and stays home with the dogs to think over everything. Jared's house isnt necessarily grand, but it definetly isn't a dump. A basement, main floor, and an upstairs. With three bedrooms, two and a half bathrooms, along with a full kitchen and living room. Jared gave one of the smaller bedrooms to Harley and Sadie- his dogs. People might call it weird, but Jared doesn't give a damn. His house his rules.

  Jared had stared at the phone for a good two hours, before doing the same to the card Sandra McCoy had left in the paperwork. Four hours of staring, trying to decide whether or not he was going to regret this as much as he thinks he will. He'd called his Mother; told her the situation, and then the doubt that he had for taking care of a child. When he brought up that he was thinking of denying the offer, his Momma had this to say-

"Jared Tristan, if you don't so much as give that sweet boy a chance I'll reach through the phone and slap you silly!" As much as Jared had known that wasn't physically possible, it had still sent a shiver down the man's spine. His momma can be scary sometimes.

 Jared had called Ms. McCoy then; telling her he'd accept the two months she'd offered, to see how it goes. She seemed pleased, and thanked him for taking his son in even if for only two months. Sandra said she'd be at his house in a week, along with the boy and his belongings. 

  "I'll leave you a week to get ready for him," she had said, before hanging up. That was three hours ago, and Jared still hasn't stopped thinking, going over everything again and again, even as he cleaned out a bedroom for the boy.

_Am I making a mistake?_


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jared gets his home ready for Jensen, and rethinks everything before the boy arrives. Jensen shows up.

It's already half way through the week Ms. McCoy had given him, and Jared is panicking. Maybe. Just a little bit. (A lot). Jared's never been alone with a child before, not really anyway; to him, babysitting his brother's and sister's children doesn't count, for reasons unknown.

It's Wednesday afternoon when Jared has his first little freak out, in front of people. He'd been in his office with Chad, both talking about what his child is like, when Jared suddenly stares at Chad with a surprising amount of fear. Chad, noticing the look, furrows his brow; looking to his friend for an answer to his confusion.

"What?"

"Chad... What if I can't be a father? What if I'm not good at it?" Sighing, Chad leans against the taller man's desk, looking at said taller man.

"Jare... If _anyone_ here is ready to take care of a kid, it's you," At Jared's indignant protest, Chad keeps going.

"No, really; Kane has a temper, Gen is a neat freak, and lets face it; I'm too immature," Jared looks to his friend, biting his lip to keep from smiling a bit. It's not every day the Chad Michael Murray admits to not being ready for something; let alone _admitting_ he's immature. The smile widens when Chad groans; swatting his arm roughly, but not enough to do more than sting a little.

"Oh screw you; here I am, trying to be nice while you're having a lady crisis, and what do you do? Make fun of me! Jeez, last time I help out a friend, I tell ya..." Jared rolls his eyes, letting Chad rant and drone on and on as much as he likes; Jared never listens anyway. It's only when Genevieve knocks on the office door lightly, before entering, does he use his ears again.

"How's it goin', Jared?" she asks, taking a chair from Chad; setting him off again on a rant. Neither Gen nor Jared care or take notice.

"I've got a room cleaned out for him, a dresser, and I don't know what he wears, or what he likes, so I'll probably leave that to him," Jared admits, not noticing the grins Chad and Genevieve share.

"The dogs-hopefully- won't be too hard on him; y'all know how they can be with new people, let alone kids," Jared racks his mind for more information to say, when he blinks, finally seeing the- in Jared's opinion- creepy smiles on his friends' faces.

"Why're you guys looking at me like that?" he questions, and Gen squeals, rushing forwards to grip Jared's arms; shaking him the best she can. He's rather sturdy.

"You're just so ready! And worried and you're doing great already!" she grins up at him; brown eyes warn and full of excitement and... Is that pride? Maybe...

"Yeah?" Jared looks at her, his own eyes nervous and worried. Hazel eyes quickly turn their gaze over to Murray, though, when he lets out a snort.

"What do you mean, 'yeah'?" He scoffs, moving forwards and pushing the shorter woman out of the way to get to Jared. Ignoring Gen's high pitched promise of slapping him to next Tuesday if he manhandled her again, Chad puts a hand on his friend's shoulder, causing the man to look up again.

"Jared, man.. You just asked me if you were ready for fatherhood," Chad starts. "And... everything you just said you did? Everything you're worried about? Is exactly what a parent should sound like," Hazel eyes widen.

"Really?" Chad laughs at the sound of shocked awe in Jared's voice. "Of course I'm sure; I'm always sure,"

Jared grins, a real one this time, and pats Chad's shoulder as a silent 'thank you'. Jared hasn't ever really even met a thirteen year old boy in this time age, besides the ones he'd met when he was that age himself. But with his son being thirteen, that meant Jared had knocked someone up when he was nineteen. Only real problem-besides the fact that he was _nineteen_ \- was that he couldn't remember being with really anyone at that age. Only person he could truly think of was.... _No._ Jared thinks harshly, pushing the guesses from his mind as quick as they'd showed up. He didn't need to be reminded of _that_ time. Jared shakes his head, pulling himself from his thoughts altogether.  _Gotta get my head in the game; it's time to work._

(FATHERHOOD OF A COP)

Friday comes and goes, and instead of going out with the rest of the precinct like he usually would, Jared gets his house ready the rest of the way. Luckily, his brother, Jeff, was in town for the weekend, and offered to help him clean up; maybe shoot the shit if they finished early. Of course, with their momma, as their momma, they knew how to clean right, and still have time left. So it didn't seem like long when Jared pulled out two beers, handing one to his brother. Jared pops the cap to his own, taking a drink, when Jeff starts talking.

"So, I'm gonna be an uncle, huh?" Jared raises an eyebrow, but nods, albeit slowly.

"Technically, you're already an uncle; Meggie's got kids, you know," he points out, but Jeff waves his words off with a slight scoff.

"Nope. For the moment, lets just pretend I ain't an uncle. Lets just imagine that this boy-"

"Jensen," Jared corrects, taking another sip of his beer. He'd finally learned his boy's name when Sandra McCoy had called yesterday, conforming that Jared would, in fact, be ready to take in _Jensen_ on Monday. _Jensen_ , Jared had thought. _Not bad, not at all; at least it's not Quincy or Rudy or something_.'

"Right... Anyway, lets assume _Jensen_ is my first nephew and or niece," Jeff corrects, throwing his little brother a look; causing said brother to laugh a bit. Jeff continues.

"What do you think my nephew's like?" Jeff questions, taking a swig of his own drink, while Jared stares at his for a minute or two; contemplating his thoughts.

"I don't know; I'd like to think he's real smart..."

"Something he obviously wouldn't have gotten from you," Jeff teases, laughing when Jared flips him off.

"Well I don't know, what would YOU want him to be like? You're his uncle, you have say," Jared points out, and Jeff shrugs, thinking for a second; just like Jared had done only moments before.

"I think he'll be really snarky," Jeff says, and Jared raises and eyebrow.

"Snarky?"

"Yeah, snarky," Jeff nods. "Real sarcastic, sometimes mean sarcastic, but funny nonetheless,"

"I just hope he's healthy, and not... All, weird," Jared admits, and Jeffrey's eyes soften, and he nudges his brother's ankle with his sock-covered foot.

"He will be," Jeff holds up his beer bottle, clinking it with Jared's, and they both take a big swig of their own respective drinks.

"He will be,"

(FATHERHOOD OF A COP)

Jared is sitting at his kitchen table Monday afternoon, when there's the sound of a car crunching through the gravel driveway. _It's time. He's here._ Swallowing loudly, Jared stands, disposing of his now empty coffee mug by putting it in the sink. He pushes the chair in slightly, and head for the door. Unlocking the deadbolt, Jared barely manages to open it a crack, before Harley and Sadie are barking; pushing against Jared's legs and squeezing their way through the door. _What a way to meet_ , Jared sighs, but follows his dogs down the short stairway of the deck, onto the driveway where there's a silver 2006 Toyota Camry parked. The 6'4" giant can make out the shadowy figure of Ms. McCoy in the driver's seat, but there isn't anyone in the passenger's. Ms. Sandra McCoy opens her own door, slamming it shut with such intimidation that, for once, Harley and Sadie don't dare go over to greet the human that just got out of the moving brick. Jared doesn't blame them.

"Mr. Padalecki," Sandra says, all professional. Jared makes his way over, but only going far enough as to where he can reach her hand to shake it quickly, before pulling it away.

"You're house is ready, yes? No damaged wires, light failures... anything that can harm the boy?" Jared confirms all of her demanding questions, but his mind is thinking completely different. _Damaged wires? Drowning problems... I thought she said he was thirteen?_ He's torn from his thoughts when the back door of the Camry is shut; not as demanding or loud as Sandra's had been, but quieter; more gentle. Harley and Sadie, no longer intimidated or frightened of the other master that got out of the moving brick, bolt for the short one that just got out of said moving brick.

"Harley, Sadie; come!" Jared says sternly, but can't help the crooked grin from forming on his face when he hears quiet huffs of laughter from the child that had just been mowed down by the two canines. He probably would've laughed, if not for the look of slight horror on Sandra's face. Apparently she doesn't like dogs...

Jared whistles, and the dogs come bounding back to him after a long, reluctant wait. The boy wipes his face of the unsurprising slobber and drool the dogs had 'shared' with him, before standing up, and walking over towards Ms. McCoy-almost shyly.

"Mr. Padalecki, this is your son, Jensen," Sandra places a hand on Jensen's shoulder, and the boy tenses up; still as a statue under her hand, and it doesn't go unnoticed by the police officer.

"Jensen, this is Mr. Padalecki; or Jared, he'll be taking care of you," she speaks softly-a huge difference from how she'd just been speaking with Jared- but the boy doesn't relax under her touch. Jared bites his lip, before taking a dare.

"Jensen, it's good to meet you," Jensen stares at his father's outstretched hand with wide, almost criticizing eyes. _He seems nice enough, but then again, Michael did, too...._ Shaking his head a bit, Jensen takes the hand, it practically swallowing his own.

Jared can't help but to notice how _small_   Jensen's hand is compared to his. Of course, being as big as he was, Jared was used to everyone else having smaller hands. But his son? His son, for thirteen, seemed fragile. Almost like he'd break if the wind knocked him down. As he encased the smaller hand in his own and shook it, Jared had only two thoughts on his mind.

_Befriend and Protect.,_


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jared welcomes Jensen into his home, all while trying to figure the boy out. Jensen tries to see what Jared's playing at, or... isn't he?

As the silver car drives off, Jared turns to the boy standing a few feet away from him; just, taking him in. He was kind of small for thirteen, or at least- smaller than what Jared looked like at thirteen. Jensen had dark blonde hair that wasn't quite as long as Jared's, but was getting there. But by the look on the boy's face when the wind causes a few strands of hair to get in his eyes, it's obvious he isn't used to it being this length. He's thinner than what Jared would expect- hey, growing boy over there- but then again, he might just have his father's metabolism. He was watching the dogs play in the now empty driveway with a bit of amusement in his green eyes. And damn, they really were green. He didn't look much like Jared at all really, but Jared wasn't really disappointed with that. He could see himself in Jensen just fine. When the boy catches his watchful gaze, he looks down immediately; a faint blush on his cheeks forming. _Poor thing's shy, huh. Damn._ Jared smiles anyway, walking closer.

"Uh.. Hey; I'm Jared, just, in case you didn't catch it before, uh..." Now it's Jared's turn to blush. _What am I doing? I'm so friggin' stupid! Of course he knows my damn name!_ Jared looks back to Jensen when he hears soft laughter. Jensen is looking up at him from his gaze on his shoes; smiling crookedly. Sadie is sniffing at his bags- or, bag...- all while butting her head against Jensen's hand.

"I know," the words are so quietly spoken Jared almost misses them. Jensen is still smiling that crooked smile at him though, so Jared takes that as a silent 'okay' to smile back. The officer of the law takes Jensen into the kitchen, where the main door lead outside to where they had just been. Jensen stands there rather awkwardly; shuffling his feet, biting his lip as he clutches his bag with white knuckles. Jared had set the boy's coat on the rack, and is now biting his own lip, not knowing what to do. _Maybe Chris? Chris is practically still a kid..._

"Hey, Jensen?" Green eyes snap their gaze up, looking to Jared with wide eyes. _Please.. not yet.. I just got here...-_

"I've got a friend.. Chris.." Okay, in Jared's defense... Yeah, there really was no defense to help the man out. But really, who starts a conversation like that? He sounds... He didn't know, but to himself Jared thought, that if he was Jensen, he'd probably tense up, too. Because that's exactly what his son did. Jensen tensed up like a cat ready to pounce, eyes going almost comically wider, as he stared Jared down with- was that _fear? Oh god, now he's scared of me...._

"Hey now.. I was just trying to say... Well, okay..." Sighing, Jared plops down in a kitchen chair. Jensen is still watching him warily, but slowly walks closer, only to pull a chair away -a rather good distance if Jared does say so himself- and sits in it carefully.

"Jensen.. um.. I was just- trying to say... uh.." Jared swallows. "There's this guy in my precinct- Chris- he's kinda like a kid... and well, I thought you might.. y'know, want to meet him...?" Alright; not the best way he could've said it, but he needed to explain fast and gentle, and it's obvious that is not in Jared's division.

"No... uh.. thank you but.. I'm not...." Jensen cuts off, taking a shaky breath- that concerns Jared in the least. Jensen gestures to himself, then around him. Jared gets it after a minute or so.

"Oh... Oh! You're not very social, are you?" At Jensen's blush, Jared nods. "Well that's fine; another time maybe," His son bites his lip, but Jared can see the faint hints of a smile. _He's all ready nicer than Michael, and JD, for that matter. Hell, nicer than ALL of them all ready,_ Jensen smiles then. Albeit it wasn't a hug smile, or a shit-eating grin, but it was enough for Jared to stop feeling like he's making his son uncomfortable.

"Want to see your room?" the words are out of his mouth before Jared can stop himself. Not like there's much wrong with asking a kid if they want to see their room, but with Jensen, he just seemed a bit more logical, and a hell of a lot more aware of his surroundings. Watchful. 

Only Jared couldn't tell if he thought that was a good thing or not yet.  


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's been a week with Jensen in his care, and Jared is still trying to figure him out. To try and strike up a small converse bond, he offers to take him to the precinct. There Jared makes some revelations. And Jensen starts to realize Jared might be different... just maybe...

Its been a week since Jensen showed up, and Jared has to admit- he kinda... _likes_ , being a dad. Despite the fact that Jensen is surprisingly independent and doesn't talk much-barely more than five sentences a day- and even though he tenses every time someone tries to touch him, Jensen isn't a bad kid. Not at all. The only problem is trying to keep up a conversation. Jared knew Jensen had at least ben told what he does for a living, and it seemed to be in the boy's bigger interests. Jared sometimes saw the way Jensen looked at the badge, read it a few times. Or the way he looks at the firearms, studies them, almost. And on the off day when Jared had to go in to do some paperwork, he sometimes came home and saw his son curled up in the corner of the couch with Sadie, watching reruns of the original _Law & Order_. Jared sometimes just watched from the kitchen doorway when it was obvious Jensen hadn't realized he was home. He couldn't keep the smile off his face when Jensen would sometimes just talk to Sadie; tell her who the culprit was and how they were stupid enough to let that one piece of evidence show. Today, Jared had been gone a little than he said he'd be, so when he unlocked the door, he was surprised at what he saw.

There was a plate of something in the oven, tinfoil wrapped over the top to help preserve some heat. The lights were out, except for the small light in the oven and the lights flashing off of the television screen. Looking around, Jared can see Sadie on the couch, her head resting over something. Walking forward, he stops short. Jensen is asleep in his usual spot on the couch, but he's now curled into a small ball, head resting on overlapping arms and Sadie's head resting on his own. Harley is lying on Jensen's other side, watching the boy almost as if to protect him. A hand is in his fur, and Harley leans into it. Looking from the kitchen to the living room, where the only sound is three pairs of breathing, and Lenny Briscoe making his usual witty remark, Jared lets everything click into place. Jensen had made _dinner_ , and even saved him some. Unable to help himself, Jared lets out a breathy laugh, removing his shoes before silently moving into the living room to check on his son. Harley moves when he comes closer, but Sadie stays where she is, merely giving Jared a once over before going back to 'watching' the colorful moving box her new human seemed to like. Jared rolls his eyes at her antics; she had been more of Jensen's dog than Jared's since he arrived, and to say Jared was a little jealous was a bit of an understatement. But he got over it, and now found it highly amusing.

Jared watches Jensen sleep for a minute or two, smiling at how relaxed he looks. Running a hand through blonde hair, Jared watches Jensen tense at first, but then relax, before turning into the touch, sighing in his sleep. Jared bites his lip, before leaning down, pressing a kiss to his boy's forehead. Smoothing down soft hair, Jared stands back up, grabbing a blanket to cover Jensen up. Turning the TV off, Jared goes back to the kitchen to eat what Jensen had left.

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Jared had eaten what Jensen had made, and was surprised at how good it was. Jensen never asked to make anything, never asked for anything really, but Jared could tell he had some real talent in the kitchen. Next day, Jared told Jensen so.

"Whatever you made last night, it was good," he says, and Jensen blushes, biting his lip as he gets the cereal down from where he keeps it; Jensen had taken one look at how messy Jared's cupboards were, and almost immediately organized them.

"Thanks," the voice was as small as always, but held a bit of happiness in it. Making Jared wonder if his son had ever really cooked for anyone else; or if his mother did that and never gave Jensen the chance. Jared had never asked Ms. McCoy who the mother was, and Jensen would go stiff as a board and wouldn't speak for hours at a time if Jared brought it up, sometimes days. So the new father had learned pretty quickly that it was a sore subject. Jared watched his son eat the breakfast food.

"You wanna come with me today?" the words are out of his mouth before he can think straight, and Jared mentally curses himself when Jensen looks at him with curious, yet guarded green eyes. Mouth full of oats, Jensen can only raise his eyebrow in question to his father's outburst.

"To the precinct, I mean," Jared stammers. "Not many of the guys are going to be there, and it'll only take a few minutes, to a half hour, but.. You're always just alone here, and..." Jared was rambling now, and he knew it, too. He looks up when he hears a laugh, and not just one of those airy, shy ones. No, Jensen is actually _laughing_ , the first real laugh Jared has ever heard. And when he catches his father eye, Jensen doesn't look away or go silent like he usually does; he quiets down a bit, yeah, but he's _smiling_ at Jared, eyes crinkling around the edges to keep the smile in place. Jared stops his stuttering, instead smiling at his boy, happy when Jensen still smiles back.

"I'd like that," the boy murmurs, and Jared nods, smiling still. _This is progress._

 

(FATHERHOOD OF A COP)

At the precinct, only Genevieve, Chad, and Kane were working, and even then, it was hardly work. On Saturdays, the three officers and therapist usually just hung out in the small break room they had, and just talked either about recent cases that left them shocked (Like the guy that tried to rob a bank with a 'gun' (It was actually a black banana) ) or just how their life was going so far. Gen was seeing a guy named Misha, and actually brought out the fun side of her. She said she was bringing him in next week, to meet the 'family' of the police squad. Letting himself into the break room, three sets of eyes look at him, and Jared can feel Jensen tense beside him. The boy sucks in a nervous breath, and that has Genevieve turning her brown eyes gaze onto him. When she squeals, Kane and Chad do the same.

"Oh. My. God! Jared! Look at him!" she exclaims, and Jared huffs a small laugh, but Jensen tenses up even more. It goes unnoticed by the two men and the woman, but not by his father. Jared carefully let's a hand rest atop Jensen's head, and instead of tensing like usual, the thirteen year old seems to take comfort in the contact. He leans against Jared's side, head resting against his father's torso- he's yet to get that waiting growth spurt- and arms crossed protectively around his stomach and rib area. When the three adults introduce themselves, Jensen quietly does the same, but won't leave Jared's side. Jared takes that as progress. _So around other people, he's even shyer than he is as home_ , Jared realizes, and keeps his hand on his son's shoulder for silent encouragement and support. As Jensen watches the three police team members, and feels his dad's actions, he begins to wonder. _I'll give him a chance, he seems to really care..._ Jensen thinks, before smiling crookedly at the one called Kane, when he nearly runs the guy, Chad, into a wall. _maybe it won't ever be as bad as before... And maybe never bad again..._


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More revelations! And Jensen gets used to talking to Jared without so many nerves getting in the way!

Jensen stayed close to Jared pretty much the entire time at the precinct. He didn't talk much; Gen being to enthusiastic and Chad asking too many questions the boy didn't want to answer. When Chad asked where his mom was, Jensen shut his mouth quick, and seemed to get stuck in some sort of flashback. Chad watched the boy pale, and it wasn't long until he seemed to start having a panic attack. Jared was talking with Chris, and didn't realize what was going on until he heard an quiet whimper. None of the others heard it; but Jared did; his ears had become accustomed to his son's quiet words and noises.

"Jen?" He frowns, looking at Jensen, when Gen looks at him.

"Yeah?" Jared just shakes his head, quickly striding over to his son. Placing a hand on the slim shoulder, Jared sees that Jensen's eyes are dulled over in a memory, his breathing shaky and labored, and that he's nearly a statue when the his hand makes contact. Frowning, Jared looks at Chad, who has the good grace to look guilty. 

"I... I just asked him 'bout his ma.... I didn't think...." The blue-eyed man swallows, looking down in shame. As much as he wants someone to blame, Jared knows Chad isn't the one to bark at. He'd never had time to warn them of how sensitive certain topics could be for Jen, and this was just one of the worser ones. 

"It's not your fault, Murray. He's just... I don't think his mother was... Well, a good set of memories," Jared admits, before turning back to the teenager. Green eyes are still dull, but lesser; as if he's trying to come out of the memory. 

"Jensen, it's okay, you're alright," he says in what he hopes is a soothing voice. It must be; Jensen's eyes clear of all fog and dullness, and with a sharp intake of breath, Jensen comes back to the present. Out of the corner of his eye, Jared can see both Chad and Chris release a relieved breath. Genevieve is staring at Jensen, an unreadable expression upon her usually soft features. It made even Jared feel uncomfortable at the way she was looking at him; so he pulled Jensen closer, the boy nearly inches from his chest. Kneeling in the position he was in, the police officer was eye to eye with Jensen. Wide orbs look at him, as if trying to see if he's truly there. Swallowing, then looking around, the blonde-haired thirteen year old quickly turns his gaze downwards.

"Sorry," he murmurs quietly, and his father, in response, blinks once. Twice. Three times.

" _What?_ " three male voices squawk, and there's suddenly a small hand on his shoulder, causing him to tense. Jensen looks up, right into maybe a little too close brown eyes. Instead of the disgust, or even hatred and scrutinizing gaze he thought he'd be getting, Jensen's own eyes widen when all he sees is concern, and gentleness.

"Jensen," Gen speaks softly- also a surprise for said Jensen. "You have nothing to apologize for," when all he does is start to shake his head, mouth opening for a protest, one skinny finger rests against his mouth; stilling his tongue.

"No, Jensen; that, was not your fault. Sure, it was unexpected for us, but that doesn't mean we blame you for it," Genevieve pauses, before speaking again.

"We won't push you for answers," the woman shoots a look behind her shoulder to the three still-reeling men, before they could say anything. Turning back to a guarded gaze, and an underlying, quiet hope for truth, Gen smiles softly. She's a psychiatrist and a therapist for trauma victims; Cortese knows her human minds.

"I give my word; I will NOT push you for answers when you're ready to tell them," she gestures to Kane, Murray, and Jared with a wave of her hand.

"If they ever push you before you're ready- even if it's Padalecki- you tell me; I'll make them regret it," at Jensen's crooked smile, the therapist allows herself to wink at him, squeezing the shoulder under her hand, before standing; giving the boy the space she knew he'd need. Passing by Jared and the boys, brown eyes show the warning she'd promised. _Push him, or make that boy uncomfortable, I'll do more than just my usual_. Chad and Kane swallow harshly at that; they get the 'usual' at least five times a month. Jared- only having gotten once- doesn't even want it again. Getting closer to the tallest of the four adults, Gen stands up taller, to be able to reach.

"Take him home, and don't let him leave your sight for twelve hours," she whispers in Jared's ear. At his questioning look, she sighs.

"Just in case he has a panic attack, or something of that nature; you're gonna want to know the second it starts," she explains, and Jared nods, before grabbing Jensen's jacket from the rack. Jensen was sitting at one of the small tables, looking at Chris, who was drawing pictures on a spare sheet of paper he'd found, and handing them to the boy. The one he had now must be pretty good, because the boy was smiling a little more than the usual crooked, forced smile he normally used.

"Keep it, Kid; I can make plenty," Jensen nods, folding the paper into a smaller form, carefully placing it in his pocket. He smiles at Chris again, before going over to Jared, who'd been watching the exchange. Jared smiles at his son, handing him the jacket; assisting him with the hood when it appears he can't quite get it. They quickly say their goodbyes, Jensen smiling at the three of them a little more than when he first met them, before getting into Jared's truck. They drive the back roads, the least busy way to get out of the city limits, in a pretty comfortable silence, before Jensen breaks it.

"Ma didn't like me very much," he says quietly, and for a split moment, Jared didn't understand. _'Ma'... Who's-_ _ooh._ When the realization sets it, and the boy sees it, Jensen continues.

"She just... I don't know why; she always said certain things, but then different things the next time and..." Jensen trails off, before taking a shaky breath; and all Jared can do is listen, and keep his hands clenched on the wheel so he doesn't do something he'll regret.

"She had... Friends, and they... They didn't like me, either really," Swallowing, Jared looks over at his son for a moment, just trying to get a picture. _Jensen is a thirteen year old BOY. Just turned thirteen not too long ago. MY son. And his mother didn't love him. Had friends that....-_

"Jen.... What did her 'friends' do?" Jensen's quiet for a minute or so, and Jared starts to feel cold dread form within him. _Please, no..._

"Sometimes she had a debt to pay," the teenager continues as if he'd never faltered, and as if Jared had never spoken. "Or she just didn't want to do the hitting herself," he whispers, blinking rapidly for a moment or two.

"One day they got sloppy; hit me in front of an office building, and some secretary in the lobby saw it," Jensen explains. "Called the cops, who then called CPS when they found all the other bruises... An-and scars,"

"I was in the system for three months, and no one wanted a traumatized kid; whoever they gave me to barely or didn't even try," Jensen huffs out a bitter laugh, as if trying to brush all of this off; but Jared can tell he's really close to letting all the frustration, fear, and emotions he's held in for so long, out. Pulling over to the side of the road, Jared turns the keys, before reaching over; pulling his son closer right before Jensen chokes on a sob, looking at him with bad memory-filled eyes. The blonde buries his face into Jared's neck, shaky hands and arms wrapping around a wider waist, and gripping the tight fabric of his father's shirt. As Jared holds his son close, murmuring nonsense and sweet- hopefully reassuring- nothings into Jensen's ear, Jared couldn't care less about anything BUT his son. Not caring about a damn thing, but protecting his son, his boy, from the bastards that had hurt him. Silently vowing to never let them get Jensen again.

And as Jensen cried into his dad's neck, letting the strong arms wrap around him and pull him closer. Lets a hand run through his hair; allows the close personal touches and small brushes of lips against his forehead and temple. Jensen just lets everything go. He knows now; knows he can trust Jared- his father, caretaker, friend. _Protector_ , goes through the boy's mind quickly, before getting lost in the fluster and blizzard of emotions and feelings overriding the brain. Jensen, for once, gladly accepts the touches, and words this man is giving and telling him. He allows himself to trust. Jensen trusts his father to tell him these things, and comfort him like this, because he knows he can trust him now. Jensen knows now, he knows. Jensen knows Jared will protect him. _Just like he's promising._


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jensen reveals some more secrets- maybe- and Jared is such a friggin dad. Prolly.

Jared held Jensen until the boy calmed down; Jensen moving back to his seat with a blush of embarrassment and shame on his face as he turns to gaze out the window. Jared drives the rest of the way home, fists clenching the wheel on and off and on again as his thoughts go from,  _right turn here, now slow down, then go_  to  _those bastards hurt my son. I want names, last recorded address, spouse, car, licsences. I want them all. And I want them-_

"Dad?" Blinking, Jared turns to look at Jensen, who's avoiding eye contact.  _  
_

"You missed the turn," frowning in confusion, Jared looks around, and, as a matter of fact, it turns out he did miss the turn of the driveway. Oops. Quickly making a U-turn, and heading back for the drive. The second the car is parked and stopped, Jensen is opening his door, slamming it shut and Jared is soon to follow. Harley and Sadie- never ones to disappoint- can be heard with their nail clacking on the hardwood floor of the kitchen; bounding up to greet their masters. Jensen silently bends down to pet Sadie, and Harley- favoring Jared- goes to the taller master of the living box. Watching Jensen go upstairs, towards his room, snaps Jared from his light trance.

"Jensen, wait," he calls, long legs allowing him to get to the staircase before the boy could make another move. Jensen is only a mere step or two above him, eyeing Jared warily. Taking a deep breath, Jared looks at him, before speaking. _Here goes nothing... (except the possible trust I've gained...)..._

"Do you think I'll hit you? Hurt you the way they did?" he asks, and Jensen tenses up, slowly moving to dash up the steps. Jared catches the movement, and, before Jensen can think, his father is gripping his wrist; not enough to hurt, or bruise, but enough to freeze him where he is, so he can't move.

"Do you think- even for a split second- that I'll raise a hand to you?" Jared asks again, and Jensen doesn't know what he's supposed to say. _Am I supposed to lie? Supposed to... No, no he wouldn't make me do that.... would he?_ The only think he does know, is that he needs to break the grip Jared has on his wrist. Using his free hand to grab at the one the police officer has on him, Jensen's breath all but disappears when another larger hand grabs that wrist, too. Jensen freezes; he's trapped. Turning back to Jared, Jensen is too caught up in his fears and thoughts to see the gentle look on his dad's face. No, all the thirteen year old boy sees is-

_Them_...

"Jen... What?" Jared looks on with shock when Jensen suddenly thrashes, trying to break from the double grip. Jared lets go, only for Jensen to topple into him as he falls; nearly crashing down the steps if Jared wasn't there to catch him. But the boy doesn't seem to care.

"Let- Let me go! I need.. Stop it!" It's the loudest Jared's ever heard his son speak, but Jared waits until Jensen is secure on the main floor before letting him go completely. He watches Jensen, frowning more and more and more with concern when the boy starts shaking, frantically looking around; as if someone is about to jump attack.

"Jensen?" Jensen jumps, back slamming into the wall, and Jared flinches when he hears the crack of the blonde's head against the railing.

"Jus-just stay away from me...." the boy stammers, and when Jared looks into green eyes, he realizes that Jensen isn't all there. Green eyes are now dulled, and looking right through him, as if he isn't there, either. Taking a step forward, Jared keeps his hands up; palms flat- showing he's weaponless.

"Jen... Kiddo, let me just..." taking a chance, Jared launches; pinning the boy's arms down, and pulling him against his chest. Jensen jerks, trying to get away, but Jared doesn't let go.

"No... nonono! Let me go! Lemme go, NOW!" Jensen's breathing picks up, and Jared drags him to the couch; the boy in his lap, arms still pinned down, but his head on Jared's chest. Keeping on arm around shaking shoulders, Jared lets his other hand gently encasing one of his son's; rearranging it so it lay, palm flat, against Jared's chest.

"Jensen," he speaks low and soft; comforting. "C'mon now, kiddo; It's alright, you're alright... I'm here, I'm here... you're alright," It seems like forever they stay like that; Jared nearly rocking the boy in his arms, trying to get the shaking to cease, along with the haunted look that pierces right through him. Though, it's only twenty minutes, when Jensen shifts, and Jared pushes him back a bit, to look at him. The boy's usually pale face is flushed, bangs clinging to his forehead, and Jared can tell he isn't going to be able to answer anything tonight. Instead, Jared lies him back on the couch, and, unable to find the damn blanket, he shucks off his own jacket, lying it over his boy. Going into the kitchen, Jared wets a rag, ringing it out, before folding it a few times, and setting it on Jensen's forehead. Jared watches him sleep, and as much as he knows he should be sleeping, too, he also knows he wouldn't be able to get much anyway.

"Oh, Jensen," he whispers, moving a stray lock of hair from the pale, lightly freckled face. "What did they do to you, my precious boy?"


	8. Chapter 8

"CPS, Sandra McCoy speaking; how may I help you?" the brisk tone of the woman from a week or so ago made Jared tense, and slightly annoyed with himself. _Can't believe I'm doing this..._

"Ms. McCoy? It's Jared; Jared Padalecki," there's a pause on the other line, and Jared doesn't know whether to take that as a good or bad sign. He decides to go with bad. Jared can almost _feel_ her icy glare aimed at him.

"Mr. Padalecki," _Ah, there's the hospitality I know and love...._ "What can I do for you?" she asks, and Jared, just for a moment, doesn't know what to say. He's keeping his voice quiet, even though he knows Jensen won't wake up for a few more hours, yet. He hadn't left the boy since his fever induced hallucinations caused him to have a panic attack, and Jared didn't plan on leaving any time soon. Jensen was curled up on the couch, head resting in his father's lap; where Jared keeps a hand gently located atop blonde locks. It seems to ground the boy, or relax him, at least; the little burst of relief being the first thing Jared had noticed when he did it the first time- back at the station.

"Mr. Padalecki, I do hope it is important; I don't have time for games," keeping down a snarky remark, Jared answers, "Yes, it is; Jensen's old caretakers...."

"What about them? What did they do?" _Strike one, she knows something_. Jared shuts his eyes, sighing.

"That's the answer I need, Ms. McCoy," he says, and the other line is silent again. "What, did they do to him? Who were they, and where are they?" the father questions, and he can hear Sandra sigh; almost as if she was dreading this conversation. Jared dint blame her; but he knew they were dreading it for different reasons.

"Jared, may I call you Jared?" Jared nods, even though she can't see it. She takes it as an affirmative. "Jensen lived with his mother, and even though she was young at the time, it seemed that- to us- she was trying; so we didn't take him away," Jared can hear the silent, _If only we had known_.

"After his first three years of life, it seems that his mother just stopped trying; barely fed him, didn't change him or help him, in what seems like any way," she explains, and Jared is getting his first true glimpse of what his son's first thirteen years of life were truly like.

"Jensen's mother went through many boyfriends, and man friends; each trying to help her make ends meet," Jared felt dread rise into his stomach. "But, when she went out with them, they went out for only two things; drugs and alcohol,"

"When they all went into debt, and it was her fault, she would let them hit Jensen; so their anger wouldn't be brought upon herself," Jared practically growls. _Bitch_.

"Even when they weren't in debt, she let them hit him around, and eventually- she hit him, too," Jared knows he shouldn't speak now. Knows he should just let her finish, but he needs to know the answer to this one question. _Now._

"H-how old was he? When the abuse started to get physical?" Jared asks, voice strained. Sandra's doesn't sound much better, when she replies, "Five,"

"She had two main on-again, off-again boyfriends," she continues, as if she needs to get all of it out in one time. "JD Morgan, and Michael Weatherly," _Morgan and Weatherly... they don't ring any bells... I'll have to check files later,_ Jared thinks.

"And they beat him just for the heck of it, and sometimes, they would let their friends in on it, as well. One in particular," Sandra swallows, and it's audible even on the other line at god knows how many states away.

"Tom Welling," Now that name Jared knew. Tom Welling was a sadistic bastard that had been caught in a homicide, drug-bust mix a few years ago. Jared and Chad had caught him, high as a kite, and as mean as a rapid grizzly when provoked. There had been two dead bodies, a middle-aged man, and an older woman; both bound and gagged, and it wasn't hard to see they had been dehydrated, starved, and tortured to death. Welling had gotten off easy- too easy, in Jared's opinion- with only five years, and a chance at parole. He had looked Jared up and down as he was dragged away to the prison bus, and had said-

"I'll get you; one way or another I'll get you!" That's when Jared had moved out of the city, and kept high security on his home. Months turned into years, and Jared eventually took what Welling had said as an empty threat. But now...

"Where are they all now?" he asks, when he realizes Ms. McCoy hasn't said anything in quite some time. Jared can hear the faint echo of keys of a keyboard being hit, before...

"Morgan and Weatherly went back to Jensen's home town; in San Antonio," _San Antonio... I lived there right before I moved up to New York._

"And Welling?" he asks, not liking how vulnerable his voice sounded; how scared.

"Welling went on parole just nine months ago, no one has heard anything of him since," Sandra pauses. "Rumor was he went back to San Atone too,"

"Ms. Sandra," Jared says, his Texan drawl coming out in the firmness of his tone. "I want these men gone; but I know I have no authority to do it myself," Jared takes a deep breath, trying to calm his nerves and his anger inside of him. He wanted to kill those sick sons of bitches, and he wanted to do it _now_.

"If I hear anything, you'll be the first to know," She finishes, and Jared nods, an action he realizes she cannot see. "Good." Jared says, voice rough.

"Call if you need anything, Jared," for the first time since that day in his office, Ms. Sandra McCoy was showing him kindness; her tone being soft, and something Jared honestly needed at the moment.

"And ma'am?" Jared's been meaning to ask this, just nearly forgot again. "Yes?"

"Jensen's mother, what's her name?" Jared knows he should've known already. He had done the math. He'd seen the signs and the features and traits, but maybe Jared just didn't want to admit to the high possibility. If he had known... She should've called him...

"Darcie. Her name is Darcie Reed," Sandra says, and Jared swallows; though the action makes it feel as if he's trying to swallow a pill the size of the earth without a glass of water.

"T-thank you, Ms. McCoy," Jared stammers, before hanging up, and when he sets the phone down, Jared sees that his hand is shaking. He wants to scream; wants to scream and curse and throw something that'll break if thrown against the wall hard enough. Hell, Jared felt like _crying_. Darcie, his first, and last, love. He knew he should've seen the damn signs. But never... Never did Jared think Darcie had the gall to do anything like that to anyone. Let alone her- _their_ \- son. Oh god... Jared thinks he might be sick. Taking deep breaths to calm himself down, Jared looks down to wear Jensen lay. Normally pale cheeks were still flushed, and Jensen's forehead had drenched, blonde curls plastered to it. Jensen's arms were wrapped around his torso and stomach, legs curled up, and his head resting in Jared's lap; right temple on his father's right thigh. Sadie was whining softly, wet, doe eyes looking up to Jared when her human doesn't stir at her presence. Jared keeps a hand on his son's head, moving the drenched locks from his forehead, letting his palm then rest there; checking the temperature.

"I'm gonna protect you," Jared hears himself say. "I promise, Jensen,"

"I always will,"

(FATHERHOOD OF A COP)

When Jensen wakes, the first thing he notices, is that he feels relaxed. Safe, even. Blinking drowsily, green eyes look around, and freeze at the sight in front of them. Jared is sitting on the edge of the coffee table, hands clasped and head down. As if he was... praying? It's then does Jensen realize he's on the couch, with a huge jacket lying over him, keeping him warm. _That's dad's jacket_ , he thinks, before sitting up. Sitting up causes a creak from the old couch leg, which causes Harley's super hearing to go into effect, causing him to snap his head up. Which leads to Sadie doing the same, but her being more enthusiastic about it; she scrambles up from where she had been sitting, claws and legs tripping on the floor to get to the boy. Her happy yipping causes Jared to look up, and when green meets hazel, for Jensen everything freezes.

"Jensen," his father is suddenly kneeling in front of him, and a huge hand is on his forehead, another on the side of his face. Jensen, surprising even himself, leans into the hand on his cheek, eyes hutting briefly at the whispered, "Oh thank god,". The hand on his forehead disappears, but the one on his cheek stays; something Jensen is actually kinda grateful for. Opening his eyes again, the boy is met with a soft smile, and relieved eyes.

"How're you feeling?" Jared whispers, and Jensen bites his lip. "I feel okay," he whispers, and Jared smiles wider, huffing a small laugh. With one last feel, Jared lowers his hand, and he sees Jensen bite his lip again, as if he was mourning the contact.

"Dad," Jensen looks up, eyes shining. "What happened?" he asks, and Jared sighs, moving around so he's sitting next to his son, and he likes to think Jensen leans into him.  _But Jensen doesn't do much contact..._

"You had a fever," Jared says softly, looking down at his son, who does look much better than he did a few hours ago. "You've been out for a good fifteen hours,"

"Fifteen hours?" Jensen repeats, eyes wide. Jared only nods, before standing. He disappears from his son's view, but comes back moments later, a glass of water in one hand, a few pills in the other.

"Here, take these for me," as much as Jensen didn't want to, he didn't want to bug his father any more than he already had; he takes the pills, swallowing them down with the water he'd been given. The water was cold; refreshing and felt frigging amazing to Jensen when it went down his throat. Looking back to his father, Jensen watches as he's gently pushed back down to the couch. When Jared goes to leave, Jensen grabs his wrist; stilling the older man's movements.

"Wait," Jensen swallows, looking up at the man. "About the other day... I'm-"

"Shh.. Jensen; it's alright, we can talk about it later," Jared soothes, and the smaller hand on his wrist slowly lowers back down. Standing to full height, Jared heads for the stairs, intent on getting a little sleep while his does.

"Dad?" Jared stills at the edge of the stairs, turning halfway to look at the boy on the couch. He sees him bite his lip, but surprisingly doesn't look away like he would've days ago.

"Will you stay with me?" To Jared, there has never been an easier answer for a question. Jared smiles, walking back over and sitting next to where his son lies, only for Jensen to lean into his side; head on Jared's shoulder, where it connects with his chest. Feeling a stronger rush of protectiveness go through him, Jared leans back against the couch, giving both of them an easier position for sleep. Jared runs a hand through Jensen's hair, hearing the soft breaths slowly get steadier and steadier. Before he let sleep take him himself, Jared puts an arm around his son, protecting him.

"I promise I'll keep you safe," he promises again, before letting sleep take him. Never knowing that Jensen opens his eyes, smiling.

"I know you will,"  


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for being gone so long, I'll try to be faster!

Since Jensen's fever, it seems the bond between father and son has grown stronger. Jensen didn't look away when he spoke, or when Jared spoke either. The boy smiles a lot more, laughs a bit longer than he would have weeks ago. Jensen seemed to like Chris Kane the most, out of all the people he'd met that day at the station, which didn't surprise his father at all really. Kane was barely twenty-five, and didn't act like it at all; which seemed to be a comfort to Jensen.

It's the third week of the second month Jared had agreed to take Jensen in. Jared knew for a fact that he would keep his son longer than the measly two months he'd been given, but with calling Sandra McCoy every few days to see if she had a lead on Welling, Morgan, or Weatherly, and making sure Jensen didn't find out about the men who made his lives hell were out of jail, Jared forgot to renew the adoption papers every time he planned on it.

It's also the third week of the second month Jared had Jensen, and the boy hadn't met his father's family. Much to the amusement of Jensen whenever his grandparents, or aunt or uncle called, and Jared got flustered and stammered an excuse. Jensen wouldn't last five minutes without laughing some days, and some days he got worried his father would have an ulcer or something before his grandma could finish yelling at him. Like this afternoon, for example, was one of those days where Jensen worried about his father's stress levels.

Jensen was in the kitchen with Jared, sitting on he counter next to the stove as spaghetti sauce was bubbling slowly, and Jared put garlic bread in the oven to cook. The police officer had his phone to his ear, holding it with one hand as he set the pan in the oven, shut the door and rose the temperature. It was his mother this time. Again.

"Mama.... yes, I know you haven't... No, I'm not getting attitude..."  Jared stammers, before setting the phone on the island, letting it go to speaker. The second he sets it down, Jensen nearly falls off the counter at the intensity and volume of the voice coming out of it.

 _"Jared Tristan Padalecki I swear on my grave that if I don't meet that boy, in another week, I will FLY up to New York and WAIT at your house, until you let me in!"_ Sherri all but screams, and Jensen would have fallen off the counter and onto his ass if Jared didn't catch him.

"You okay?" Jared asks quietly, setting him down so his feet touch the floor. Nodding, Jensen watches as his father goes to the phone, before hesitating when more shouts blast through the speakers. Making his over, the young teenager grabs the phone from Jared's hand, turning the speaker off and holding it up to his ear.

"Jared Tristan you better-"

"Ma'am? This ain't Jared Tristan," Jared's current signals to give him back the phone, and the ranting on the other line cease and seem to freeze. Clues seem to click into place for Sherri Padalecki, because she suddenly lets out a sharp inhale.

"Jensen?" she asks, before huffing a small laugh. "Well, it is about damn time!" Jensen smiles crookedly, though she can't see. They talk; well, more like Sherri talks about pretty much everything she can think of, while Jensen says the occasional word or two, while Jared finishes up cooking dinner. Spaghetti done, garlic bread done enough to smelt burnt, Jensen ends the call with his grandmother.

"You," Jared says when the phone call is finished. "Are insane to willingly talk to her," Jensen shrugs, smiling despite the small blush that appeared on his face. They eat in silence, the only noise being the scraping of forks and the occasional cracking of well done bread on teeth (both human and canine).

Since it's Wednesday, _Law & Order_  was on pretty much all night, and of course, Jensen was watching it when Jared gets out of the shower. The boy had taken one before Jared did, and even though that was almost an hour ago, blonde hair was still wet, and dripping onto the shirt the boy had on. With everything that needed to be done, done, and Jared having not been called in that day, the Texan turned New Yorker sits on the couch just as a new rerun of an episode starts.

It's peaceful. Normal, almost. Jensen relaxed next to him, and Jared not having to worry about his son being nervous or shy. Jensen feels safe with him. To Jared, that's how it should be, how it should've been this whole time. When it hits eleven-thirty, Jared is asleep on the couch, sitting in the same position he'd been in, except this time he head is thrown back and a snore will ring through the silent house every few minutes. Jensen's asleep as well, but he had shifted during his slumber; a blonde-hair covered head resting on his father's thigh, and Sadie's own head resting on the boy's ankles.

Oddly domestic. But no one would have it any other way.

(FATHERHOOD OF A COP)

Full, red plush lips form into a smirk when a blue, 1973 Mustang Cobra pulls into the empty lot. She had started to get worried they wouldn't show; they were running late, after all. When the car pulls up to right beside where she stood, and the window rolled down to reveal a man with a salt and pepper beard in the driver's seat, a brunette in the passenger's, she gets in the back. Also in the back, hidden in the darkness of shadows almost like a cliché in the movies, and only being illuminated when they Cobra passes a streetlight, is a man. His face, even in the bright lights of the street, is hidden; the only real thing noticeable are grey-blue eyes as cold as steel that look at the woman with dark green eyes, and dirty blonde hair.

"We found him," a deep voice says from the feet, and a slow, white-toothed sadistic smile also becomes another feature seen; right below the cold steel eyes that make the man look like an even creepier- and human- like version of the Cheshire Cat.

"Excellent,"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I own nothing but the plot, this is merely for my entertainment and hopefully the people who read this' as well. Darcie Reed is my own character, and anyone with the same name is simply coincidental.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When Jared gets called into work, he and Chad go to a house where there's been a call of a break-in. But what happens when the house is empty, and there's only a note on the mirror giving them any clue as to what's going on?

Jared woke up to the sound of his pager going off, along with Harley barking at the small piece of technology as if it was evil.  _Technically not wrong_ , Jared thinks as he grabs it, sitting up to get the crick out of his neck. Jensen is still sleeping; though he turns away from Jared when the man gently pushes him away so he can stand up. Jared squints at the a small screen.  _Break-in.... Murray on his way... Break-in... Murray on his-_

Jared lowers the pager, turning it off before getting dressed as quickly as he can, grabbing his badge and firearms as he makes his way for the door...

"Where ya goin'?" Jensen's sleep-muddled voice breaks into Jared's instinct of police-man, and he lowers his hand from the doorknob.

"Got called into work today, Jen," Jared says softly. He hadn't gotten called in since a few weeks ago. "I'll be back soon; just a break-in," Break-ins were always easy; the victim almost always had something valuable missing, and with thrift shops just around almost every corner, it was then easy to track down and find. _This is just another one of those_ , Jared thinks as he walks out the door. Leaving his son alone.

(FATHERHOOD OF A COP)

Jared was with Chad; both of them loading their guns for safety precaution as they headed up the steps to the house in the Bronx. It wasn't really their area, but they had received the call, so here they were. Chad kicks the door open when the countdown finishes, and he leads the way inside, Jared following with his own gun held up, aimed at anything that could be a potential threat. It's when Jared checks the main floor, and Chad checks the upstairs, and they meet at the steps with nothing gout of the ordinary, does Jared get the feeling that something's wrong.

"Anything upstairs? Broken glass? Open window? Anything?" he asks, but Murray shakes his head again. "Did you check every room downstairs?" Chad retaliates as they both look through the kitchen and bathrooms.

"I'm pretty sure," Jared calls from the kitchen, and Chad is opening a smaller room's door slowly; gun raised in his free hand. It looks like a closet, but empty of what appears to be everything but a mirror that goes from the ceiling to the floor, and takes up almost half of the wall in width. A few shards of glass are obviously cracked in the mirror; as if someone threw a punch or two to the appliance. But there is still a clear look at what's on the glass.

"Jared! Come look at this!" Rushing into the room, Jared sees two things. The first thing he sees, is Chad on the phone, asking whoevers on the other line- presumably Gen- who the hell owns this house, and to get another squad car over here, NOW. The second thing he sees, is the mirror. Normally, he would've brushed pass the mirror and go back to looking around the room for whatever Chad had yelled at him to come see. But he really can't do that when the only thing in the room- besides Chad- _is_ the mirror. It's cracked in some places, and looks like it's covered in dust on the edges and all in all had seen better days, but there was also something written on that mirror. In what looks to be black sharpie, or many paint, it reads-

'I told you I'd get you in one way or another'

For the first few moments, Jared doesn't understand. Was it some domestic fight, and some girl got pissed and stole the guy's cat? What was-

No... No.. he can't be...

_"I'll get you; one way or another I'll get you!"_

Jared doesn't notice when he drops his gun, or when Chad stopped talking on the phone, and instead started asking him if he was okay. He doesn't remember getting back into the squad car, yelling at Chad that if he didn't get his ass in the car at that very moment, he'd get shot, or when he hightailed it out of the Bronx, speeding all the way home, and ignoring any speed limit sign, or red light he saw. Jared just kept going, siren sounding through the air and wheels squealing on the driveway when he brakes so suddenly the whole car lurches just enough for Chad to hit his head on the dashboard.

What Jared does remember, is seeing his front door open, even though he had locked it when he left. He remembers seeing the dogs on the floor of his living room, drugged by a liquid in a now empty syringe lazily left on the floor next to where they sleep on the rug in the living room and kitchen. He remembers Chris speeding down the street in the other squad car Chad had called for what seems like years ago. Jared remembers Kane going upstairs, and finding blood on the carpet in Jensen's room, as well an another syringe- now empty. What he does remember is seeing the same message scrawled on the TV, but this time it's written in red, and it's still dripping onto the floor in a crimson shade Jared knows all to well.

Jared remembers the exact moment he realized that Welling had taken his son.


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ... There's really nothing I can say without giving anything away... NO REGRETS!

Jared is pacing his own home, ignoring the small whinnies from Harley and Sadie- they had woken up a few minutes earlier- and one flame away from exploding as Kane, Chad, and Eric Kripke himself were looking for clues in the Padalecki household.

"Jared," Gen asked when she had finally arrived; brown eyes wide and concerned. "What happened?" Jared exploded.

"Welling broke into my home! He broke into MY home and took MY son!" he bellows, not caring when Genevieve shies away, looking down, or when Kripke turns to look at him.

"Padalecki, we need you to calm down so you can help us,"

"Boss!" Chad says, rushing down the steps with Chris in toe. "We found blood on a t-shirt in the kid's room, and it isn't all Jensen's," Even though it's one of the worst time to, Jared lets out a shaky breath of relief, at the words. That means Jensen put up a fight.

"Who's blood is it?"

"A guy named JD Morgan, and Jensen," Chad says, looking almost as murderous as Jared himself. The whole Station had taken a liking to Jensen- even Kripke. The boy had even gotten a _smile_ out of the chief. And in return, the chief wanted to give the boy shooting lessons when his father would finally agree to it. Taking a step forward, Genevieve lets her hand rest on Jared's arm, squeezing it.

"We'll find him, Jared," she says, making eye contact with the equally lethal and worried father.

"We'll find him," Oh, Jared had no doubt that they'd find Jensen. He'll travel to fucking Shanghai if he has to. What really worried him was if they'd his son in _time_.

(FATHERHOOD OF A COP)

When Jensen woke up, the first thing he realized was the ever growing pain of nausea and an ache in his head. The second thing he realized, was that he was moving. Not walking or moving on his own though, no; more like he was being driven somewhere... But that wasn't possible because Dad wasn't home and he didn't have a-

 _Oh no... No, no, no, no, NO, NO, NO!_ Jensen thinks, trying to move but unable to get more than a few unsuccessful attempts. Heart beating frantically and eyes flickering around the darkness of the trunk, Jensen twists and turns his hands every which way; trying in vain to get the painfully tight bonds from his wrists. The car lurches forward suddenly, and the boy doesn't have the time, nor the flexibility at the moment to brace his head before it slams against the hard side of the trunk. Shutting his eyes tight as the pain slams in, Jensen sees nothing but white, before all black with little fireworks of exploding colors afterwards. Light comes through his shut eyelids soon enough, but it isn't from him.

"Hey there, Jensen," a rough, cold, and all too familiar voice says, and Jensen feels his heart go cold and blood run stale. "Remember me?" Unable to help instinct, Jensen jerks when big, cold hand grab him roughly by the shirt, forcing him from the car with one strong pull. _Jeffery_ , Jensen thinks; but he doesn't need guesses to know he's right.

"We lost you for a while," another voice pitches in. It's a little higher than JD's, but just as revolting and downright familiar. "But that's okay," there's a pause, before green eyes look up to the two men casting shades down on his body; which is sprawled on the ground, unable to move. Another form makes itself known.

"Because now we can make up for lost time," Jensen's breath catches, and his eyes turn big and damn near letting the terror and panic known to his captors. Big, red lips form into a thin, sleazy smile.

"Hello, sweetheart,"

 _Mom._  


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jared works on tracking Jensen down, and a little Jen aftermath scene.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! I apologize for this chapter being so short, but I'll make it up to you guys asap! For all you mothers out there, happy mother's day! You are all amazing!

After ten hours at the precinct, Kripke and everyone else forced Jared to go home and get some rest. Well, forced is the perfect word for it, but instead the giant man stayed in a hotel room not far from the station. He wanted to be there as soon as they found something out, but Jared also didn't trust himself to be able to do anything good for anyone if he went back home. When he checked into the suite, he called Jeff, who works as a doctor down in Texas, to keep an eye out for the reports or anything weird going on. After that, Jared couldn't hold back, and told his big brother everything; from the day Jensen actually started getting so much better with him, to present time.

"I just..." Jared takes a shaky breath, looking out the window and onto the streets of NYC at midnight. "Jeff, what if we don't find him in time?" he asks, and even halfway across the country, in the cool Texan night air, the doctor can hear the fear in his brother's concerns. _What if he's dead? What if he won't trust me anymore?  What if I don't get my son back?_

"JT, you'll get him back- in time, too," Jeffrey soothes. "I know you're scared, hell, I am, too, but Jared; you need to keep in mind that Jensen is a tough kid,"

"He's gonna fight because now he's gotta reason to fight back to try to escape besides the fact that those people are fucking crazy,"

"And what reason is that?" Jared asks, watching as lightning brightens the streets long enough for hazel eyes to see a stray dog to climb into a garbage can; rummaging around for scraps of food.

"He's got you, now,"

(FATHERHOOD OF A COP)

Pain, that's all Jensen could feel. Hot, white binding pain that started at his head and went all the way down to his toes. Blood leaks from his left temple, slowly going down his face and pausing at his chin; it dripping slowly... hypnotizing...

He thinks he can hear laughing, cackling- as if someone told a joke, but Jensen can't really remember if anyone said anything at all. Or if they did, if it was even humorous. He doesn't want to think about this stuff. He wants to think about lying outside or on the couch with Sadie; talk to her about the culprit behind the latest murder in Manhattan with Lenny and his newest partner, or tell her how Jack McCoy was doing the right thing by breaking the deal he had made prior. Jensen wanted to throw a Frisbee to Harley; watch him run after it before becoming a total slacker and pin hi to the ground with the huge dog head on his chest. Jensen wanted to think about his dad, how he ruffles his hair and gives him side hugs when he's running out the door and then real full hugs when he comes back from a court meeting or looking at a case that left him shaken or frazzled. He wanted to listen to his dad mutter and curse whenever he burned himself on the oven when he tried to cook- Jensen always ended up instructing him.

All of these things made him smile crookedly, through the split lip and the bruises on his cheeks. It made him want to laugh with his already burning lungs and pain-filled sides until he thought they were going to break open again. Or cry; hell, that was something he'd been wanting to do for a long time. Jensen had never really given himself time to grieve, or to react to everything that's ever happened to him in his short life. His mother being a drug-user and hanging out with dealers and assholes all the time. Letting them come over to take advantage of him before he even knew the times tables. Never being given a single ounce of love or family worth having he could remember until he met his father, Jared. Jensen wanted to live with his father- granted, at first he wasn't sure, and was tempted to ask Jared if he could get Ms. Sandra to pick him up. But the second he heard his dad fumble, start stammering something about his name, Jensen knew he wouldn't want to leave.

So there, in wherever the hell his mother and her dick friends had taken him, with his hands tied behind his back and a blindfold over his abused eyes, Jensen let himself break down and cry. Let himself sob over everything that could happen while he was MIA back at home. Maybe his dad is actually happy he's gone, won't bother to look for him. He can just say that he acted out, or asked to go back if anyone asked. What if... what if.. what if...

So Jensen cries that night- or at least he thinks it's night- about everything and for everything and anything that could happen. Unaware that his father has tears in his own eyes, scared and thinking about everything and for everything and anything that can happen as well.

The both cry, for all they could lose if they don't have each other.


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So sorry for the delay, I've been trying to make this just right. Please just stick with me and hopefully y'all will enjoy it! I apologize in advance if this is short, but chapter 14 will be coming out after this one much sooner.

It's been three days. Three days since the first night after Jensen was kidnapped. Three days since Jared's slept. Three days since he's taken a break out of looking for his son.

And they still haven't found anything; leads, witnesses... nothing.

And Jared was starting to lose it.

He's currently standing behind Chad, watching his partner as he types in a series of codes that will bring up any report of any suspicious activity any bystander could've seen and saw out as unusual. Murray, Kane, and Gen all had a long list of reported things, and so far, none of them have found much. It was only when Genevieve called out that afternoon, did Jared allow himself to hope that they were getting on the right track.

"I think I've got something!" the brunette calls. "A man seen with a black eye and bandaged hand, showed up at a gas station just a little before the border," Jared walks over to her, peering over the woman's shoulder to look at the screen. The bandage on the guy's hand was slightly red, as if blood had started seeping through.

"When was this?" Kripke asks, and Gen looks at the report for a minute or so. "A day ago," Jared bites his lip. A day. That could mean they're anywhere by now, or on their way to god knows where. With more quick typing, Genevieve pulls up a video clip from the security camera of the gas station. The car is kind of old, and, for Jared, rare to see.

He hopes he isn't the only one to think that they just got a little more hope.

******

Jensen's not doing good. At _all_. The boy can't feel his hands from them being tied behind his back so long without a second of release, his eyes are nearly sealed shut completely, and more than just the aches and pains and bruises, Jensen is terrified. He's terrified of not being found. He's terrified of never seeing his dad again.

Jensen's terrified of dying before telling his dad he loved him.

Being alone in the trunk of the car, and in his own subconscious had given the boy time to think, and the more he thought, the more he realized he truly did love living with Jared. Knowing when he woke up, the dogs would catch him on his way down the stairs, jumping and full of glee to see him ( and the fact that they wanted food). And Jared would try to make food, but end up burning it- or himself. Jensen loved living with his father, and more importantly Jensen loved Jared. Being with him, able to be himself around him, and being able to rely on his father when he truly needed to.

Jensen never had to put up a façade with him.

Being torn from his thoughts by a gruff curse, Jensen turns his unseeing eyes- really, would they just tear the damn blindfold off- towards the area the noise had come from.

"You're sure, for a fact, that the fuzz won't be able to track us? Because we all know we ain't ready to move back to San Antone," Jensen feels slight dread crawl back into his veins. _San Antone? They want to take me all the way back to Texas?_

"I know for a fact the cops won't; they probably still think we're in Manhattan," that sounds like JD, Jensen thinks wryly. And by the snort of amusement he gets for an answer, and the pithiness of it- not to mention the bitchiness of it- that's Mom. Hearing heavy footsteps come near, and getting louder every step, Jensen mentally prepares himself for another beating. He'd physically prepare himself, if he wasn't weak. Jensen hated showing weakness, but this time, in his mind, he would admit to being too weak, too injured, to try to put up a fight besides the fact that he won't die, or tell any of them anything. He hasn't said a word.

Then again, bruising his jaw and making him spit up blood nearly hourly didn't help anything.

"Ready to play, Jenny?" Welling, Jensen thinks, before swallowing audibly. The boy can practically see and hear Welling's sadistic grin. Welling was always the worst.  

"Well then, lets get started,"

******

"Thanks for your help, Ma'am," Chad says as nicely as he can tolerate, before walking away from the woman, Jared right behind him. They'd driven out to where the footage had been shot of the man, and had found out the man had paid with cash, had- from this lady's perspective- maybe three people in the car with him, and looked like he had gotten a few bad hits in a fight. She sais he went south, more towards the border of New York and Pennsylvania. Not knowing anything else, they let her go with a simple, 'good day' and 'thank you for your cooperation'. Jared sighs as they get into the squad car, letting Chad drive.

"Down towards the border could mean anything, Chad," he sighs, checking his phone and pager for any news he might've missed. Any hint of anything.

Nothing. Just like the last two days.

"You gotta keep hope, Jared," Chad says, just as he does every time Jared says something along the lines of what he just had. It's almost a routine now.

And Jared hates it. Hates that it's becoming an almost daily routine. Hates that it happens so much a day. Hates that he can't do anything more than what he's doing now which, in Jared's eyes, is practically nothing. The cop hates that he hasn't gotten a good lead to finding his son.

Mostly, Jared just hates being afraid. He doesn't want to be afraid anymore.

"Yeah," Chad's voice breaks into his stupor, and Jared looks at him.

"Really?" he suddenly says; pressing a hand to Jared's chest to stall him, or get his attention, or both. Either way, Jared's listening.

"You better not be playing with me on this, Gen," a pause. "True. Alright, where?" Taking his hand off the broad chest, Murray grabs a piece of scrap paper from his pocket, quickly setting it on the wheel and grabbing a pen from his pocket. As he writes, he only causes the horn to go off twice by pressing down too hard.

Jared barely notices, too busy starting at his friend, eyes wide and waiting for something, _anything_ , to give way.

And then it happens. It happens when Chad suddenly stops writing, and ends the call with Cortese.

"I think they found him," Gen wouldn't have called if she wasn't almost 100% positive. And she wouldn't have let Chad sass her at all about her playing with them on this if she wasn't completely serious about what it was she was telling him.

So Chad telling him that Genevieve, Chris, and everyone else at the precinct had gotten a lead and had given them a good address?

Jared just hates that Chad hasn't started driving yet.

******

Another squad car is tailing them to the right by the time they get on the road and headed for the house. Jared's got too many thoughts running through his head at once to have even a single word to say to his partner. What if they don't find him in this place? What if the lead was wrong? What if they were just wasting time doing this?

Shaking his head away from those thoughts, Jared simply gets his gun ready, and when he sees an old, small building with boarded up windows?

He turns the safety off.

*******

Jensen's finally out of the chair, just not how he would've liked it to go. On his back, but curled to his side a bit, Jensen is beaten to hell, and can't breathe. He knows for a fact that he won't last longer if he doesn't get help soon. He just doesn't know when that help would arrive.

Jensen doesn't know if he can wait that long anyway.

Welling went all Joker on him; Jensen knows what a crowbar feels like, and the definitely without a doubt was a crowbar. He's pretty sure he can still feel it in his teeth.

He knows more blows are meant to come, but for some reason, they start to slow; cease in quickness. As if something's stalling Welling.

As if he hears something to stall him.

"Shit!" that sounds like Jeffrey Dean. "I hear sirens, we need to go!"

"I thought we were safe here!" Darcie screams, higher than the men in the room.

"I did too," Morgan admits, sounding ashamed of himself. Either that or he's just afraid of what Welling would do to him.

Tom Welling was a scary fucker when he had to be. Which was all the time.

"You go start the car!" he barks. "Darcie! You try to stall them," As the other two go to do as he says, Tom grabs what's left of Jensen's shirt, yanking him to a painful sitting position so he can bend down and sneer in his ear-

"While I finish you off,"

_Dad please hurry_

******

"Come out with your hands up!" Kripke orders, when he, Jared and Murray, along with Kane head for the door behind him. After a second of silence, Eric doesn't even bother with knocking again.

_Screw warrants_ , he thinks, as he allows Kane to kick the door down with ease. _I like my way better_.

The four men burst into the building, weapons aimed and arming them against whatever might suddenly make an appearance.

Like one petite woman with dark blonde hair and ivy green eyes, as well as a red satin lipped smile that curves in the most devious of ways. Jared growls at her, aiming his gun without mercy or hesitation.

"Jared, have you met our son? Isn't he just _lovely_ ," she sneers, all while confirming Kripke, Chad, and Kane's guesses.

This bitch was Jensen's mother.


	14. Chapter 14

"Where is he, Darcie?" Jared growls, never taking his aim off of the woman standing before him. "Where's Jensen?" The woman merely rolls her eyes and sneers, looking at the four men with their guns trained on her. She's looking less than unfazed, but Jared can see her eyes sense that she might not make it out of this alive.

Jared hopes she doesn't.

"Where is he?" he asks again, and Darcie puts a completely different mask on her features.

"It's been so long, Jared,"

******

He's dying, he knows he is. There's no other solution. Welling left him on the floor while he rummages through his coat pocket, looking for whatever the hell he said he needed.

Jensen blocked him out after he heard the sirens. That meant someone was coming, whether his dad- he hopes it is- or another police officer, it meant if they could just get down here in time he'd be okay. Everything would be okay.

But now Jensen isn't so sure. His hands, which were finally untied, were shaking and cold, clammy, and useless to him now. Jensen was too weak to do anything.

"Y'know," Welling's cold, rough voice suddenly breaks through Jensen's walls. "I always imagined killing you in this big huge way," he chuckles, as if telling some funny story.

"But it seems we've run out of time with our fun little game," Welling sighs, sounding disappointed in it. Turning so he was now facing Jensen, he wields a gun; watching himself as he waves it around. Through swollen eyes, Jensen manages to watch blurry figures dance within his slim line of sight.

"It's been fun, Jenny," Welling says, cocking the gun and aiming it at the bleeding boy's nearly lifeless body.

"I hope we meet again, in another life; to continue our fun,"

******

"Whatever happened to us, Jared?" Darcie sighs, as if she really cares and they aren't really in the kind of situation they're in.

"Cut the crap," Kane suddenly snaps, having lost the patience he had managed to possess. "Where's the boy?"

"It's not like he's worth it anyway," Darcie suddenly says, as if she's losing her cool, or knows something is about to happen.

As if she knows something already _has_ happened.

**_BANG!_ **

When the shot rings out, Darcie jumps, and it's Chad who uses it; rushing towards her while she's distracted and grabbing her wrists, cuffing them behind her back without a second thought. He hands her off to Kripke, who reads her the Miranda Rights as he roughly leads her out to where his own squad car is, and she'd only just coming back to herself on what just happened.

The second the shot rang out, Jared rushed to the only other place left in the house he hadn't seen.

The basement.

******

Welling was staring at the stairs when the three police officers left came bursting through the door leading to the basement stairs.

"You're late for the show, fellas!" Welling calls. "Y'all shoulda seen it, it was _lovely_ ," he sighs, as one would do when recalling a happy memory from childhood or past experiences.

Jared leads the way, followed by Kane and then Chad, and when he looks into the room, he feels a ringing sensation in his ears and his heart go cold and dread fill his veins.

Jensen's lying on the cold, dirty floor, blood leaking out of him everywhere Jared can see in the dimly lit room. His dark blonde hair is matted with blood and his shirt is ripped and torn in small fragments. He's curled on his side about halfway, his right arm pale and lying over himself, his left hand lying in a puddle of crimson; so pale it stands out almost perfectly in the darkness. Jensen isn't moving.

Jared doesn't think; he aims his gun and pulls the trigger. He watches as the bullet goes through Welling's forehead, as the red platter on the wall behind and how he drops like a bowing ball to the floor.

Jared wishes he'd had more time so he could've made him suffer.  

******

Next thing Jared knows, he's running towards his son, quickly falling to his knees and turning Jensen over on to his back. His boy's face is bruised and cut and swollen; his eyes black and bottom lip bleeding and cut, forehead sliced and cheeks black and blue and a shade of purple. Familiar crimson is slowly but steadily making its way through Jensen's chest.

In the size of a bullet hole.

"Jensen," Jared breathes shakily, moving the boy's bangs from his eyes, as if they were open and not shut. Jared doesn't get a response. The man shakes his head, paling as his breath hitches.

"Jare...-"

"Call an ambulance!" he screams, cutting Chad off. "Call a damn ambulance now!" Jared turns his attention back to his son.

"You're okay, Jensen," he says shakily, removing his jacket and shirt; bunching the cotton blue material of his tee up before pressing it tenderly to the seeping wound in his lower chest. The father's fear rises when Jensen doesn't make a sound at all.

Leaning down, Jared rests his ear over the teenager's chest; waiting, listening. For a sign, a sound, something.

When it comes in the form of him pulling in a barely there, terribly ragged and wet inhale for air, Jared can't help the slight sigh of relief he releases; letting himself breath easily for just a moment.

"Jared," Kane places a hand on his friend's broad shoulder. "We need to get outside, the ambulance is going to be here soon," Nodding, Jared gently lifts Jensen up, holding him close and still managing to apply pressure to the gunshot wound.

******

Kripke takes his car with Darcie in it back to the station, and with him already gone when the ambulance arrives Kane rides with Murray. The EMTs let Jared ride with is son to the nearest hospital.

It's on the ride to the hospital that thirteen year old Jensen stops breathing.

 


	15. Chapter 15

_It's on the ride to the hospital that thirteen year old Jensen stops breathing..._

_******_

Jared is numb, sitting in the too-small waiting room chair in the hospital a little ways from his own home. His leg bouncing up and down in impatience and nervousness, eyes flickering from people in the room to nurses behind the desk to doctors going in and out of the ER and ICU.

Jensen is in surgery now; has been since they got there, which, by looking at the clock on the wall, and then his watch to make sure the time is right, means it's been three hours since Jensen stopped breathing and had been rushed even faster to the hospital; defibrillators suddenly pressing down on his injured chest and right about then was when Jared shut down.

Watching his son jerk up with every electric shock, every jolt of energy trying to get Jensen to breath again would forever be stuck in the father's memory, he knew it would. If Jared's completely honest, he doesn't think he'll ever forget. A hand on his shoulder causes hazel eyes to slowly rise, dull and pain-filled.

"Hey Jared," Genevieve says softly, sitting down in the chair next to the native Texan. Jared looks drained- shadows under his eyes from sleepless nights, skin pale and normally warm and bright hazel eyes dull and broken and lost. Some things the small brunette had never seen in her friend's gaze before. She doesn't blame him.

"Gen..." Jared trails off, swallowing. "Gen they said he might never recover fully, if at all; and I'm not even talking about the emotional trauma," he explains, and she listens as she sits next to him. It's her job, after all.

"Jared, I am not going to lie to you and say that after a few weeks everything will be rainbows and sunshine and you and Jensen will live happily ever after," she says plainly, before continuing.

"He will _always_ have scars from this, always. Nightmares, physical scars and mental, but he will recover as much as he can if you don't give up on him,"

"Up until he met you he never had someone to take care of him, to love him and make sure he was okay. Never had someone to willingly come home to after school or go to when he had problems or questions he wanted answers," Genevieve's words hit so close to true it made Jared's eyes sting with tears, but he wouldn't let them fall. He needed to be strong right now, and listen to what his friend had to say. Her own big brown eyes were shining with tears, determination, and truth.

"If I'm being honest, he's stronger than we all think because he has these scars on his soul," Gen takes a breath, pausing as she clasps one of Jared's huge hands in both of her smaller ones.

"He's got a reason to fight now, a reason to live, because of you," At the father's look of confusion, she sighs.

"Jared, he trusts you, feels safe around you. You're the first person in his life to have ever shown him a kindness, and made it heartfelt," she says, keeping eye contact until Jared finally looks away with a sigh.

"Okay, okay," Jared breathes, nodding as he looks back up towards the doors leading to the ICU.

******

"Family of Jensen Ackles?" a doctor says after hours of waiting, and Jared- along with Chad, Genevieve, and Kane stand at the call.

The boy captured all of their affection maybe the second they laid eyes on him.

"Er... _Parent_ of Jensen Ackles?" the doctor tries again, and Jared steps forward.

"That's me," _Please give me good news,_ Jared prays silently.

"I'm Doctor Singer, I was lead operator on your son," he explains, allowing Jared to follow him pass the doors, but no one else waiting for the news. Jared follows, in-step with the doctor as they go pass room after room.

"The gunshot wound was a bit of a difficulty, but with help, and time, I feel it will recover quite nicely," Dr. Beaver stops outside of room 301, where the door is shut. Taking a pause, the older man looks at the young father.

"I'll be frank with you, Mr. Padalecki-"

"Jared," the police officer says suddenly, cutting the good man off. Nerves is what Jared'll blame it on later. "Please, call me Jared," Nodding slowly, Beaver clears his throat, gently placing a hand on a broad shoulder.

"Well, I'll be frank with you, Jared," he says quietly, pausing as a few nurses walk by. "Jensen still has many terrible injuries that need time to heal, I stitched most of them up, bandaged others, but he still needs time to heal,"

"His left leg I had to place in a cast, and that'll need to stay on for at least three months- longer if there isn't enough improvement," Jared nods, urging the man to continue.

"You said he'd been gone three days?" Jared nods, wincing internally at the thought of the longest three days of his life. Beaver nods.

"Well, even in those three days, Jensen hadn't had anything to eat, drink, and seemed to have a few drugs in his system," the Texan swallows, trying to cease his jaw from clenching in anger. 

"His stomach was completely empty, he wasn't running on anything but pure luck and true grit," Sighing, the bearded elder man clasps his hands together after running one of them down his face.

"Your boy is lucky to be alive, Jared," he says softly, looking at the father. "And I honestly don't know how he'll manage- and not just the physical injuries," Nodding, Jared blinks a few times as he swallows, before looking back to the man.

"What do you suggest I do to help him?"

"Talk to him, don't give up on him. Don't force him to talk, but be there for him when he decides to,"

As he goes to walk away, Doctor Beaver pauses, before giving Jared's shoulder a brief squeeze.

"Don't let Jensen push you away, Jared,"

"If you need anything, ask for Jim," he smiles crookedly at Jared. "I'll give you some time alone with him, but he'll be unconscious for quite a while if I'm being honest,"

Jared watches Jim Beaver walk away, towards other patients and another room, before turning around to look at room 301.

Taking a deep breath, and trying to compose himself a bit, steel himself for what he might be about to see, the father walks in.

******

Walking in to room 301, Jared expected a lot of things. He expected his son to be on a hospital bed, in a hospital gown, with IVs and such. Expected it.

He didn't expect his boy to be as pale as freshly fallen snow, except for the visible skin on his arms and face and neck that were the assortments of blues, blacks, purples, and yellows. He didn't expect hand-shaped marks on a pale throat, or a breathing mask to be over Jensen's face.

Jared didn't expect it to _hurt_ so much. To immediately have a lump in his throat and tears sting his eyes.

Though, if he thought bitterly, he supposed he should've.

That was fucking _Welling_. He had done this to his son without a single second thought, or regret.

Jared really wished he could go back so he could torture him, rather than quickly put a bullet in his sick, sadistic head. If it had been reversed, and Jensen was already safe and secure and not close to dying, Jared would've made a deal like that in heartbeat.

Slowly, quietly walking forward, Jared sits in a chair next to the bed, and gently encases the small, pale, hand in his own bigger, tanner one.

Jensen's hand was cold to the touch, and Jared's one encases it easily; hopefully giving some warmth to him.

"Jensen... God, kiddo.. I'm so sorry," he whispers, trying to talk around the ever-growing lump in his throat. The heart monitor remains the same, and eyelashes don't flutter, and a boy doesn't stir.

And a father's heart doesn't stay whole.   


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> NOTICE- Going through Ch.15, I noticed that when the doctor was first introduced, I named him as Doctor Singer, but then when noticed any other time he was said to be Dr. Beaver. I apologize for the confusion if any, but his name is Doctor Beaver.

It's been two days since Jensen was admitted to the hospital, and in that time Jared only left twice; once to get a few new changes of clothes, and the other time to grab his phone and a charger in case someone called. Five people have called him, but he didn't pick it up once. He didn't care. The only thing he cared about was his son, and him getting better. Genevieve visits once during the second day, trying to get him to talk about what he's feeling, but Jared doesn't budge. She probably thought it was because he didn't want to talk to her, or didn't want her to know anyway. Jared knew the real reason he didn't tell her was because he didn't know what he was feeling himself. Sad? of course. Mixed in with hundreds of other emotions he couldn't place because the second they made themselves known, another one took its placed and the one before it vanished. As if a dream you have and the second you're at the good part, or close to finding something out, someone or something wakes you up.

Jared doesn't know how to explain what he's feeling. The man doesn't know if that's a good thing or not.

******

On the ninth day of Jensen being in the hospital, Dr. Beaver tells the worried father that if the next surgery goes as planned, and Jensen heals properly from it, the boy can get signed to go home within a few days afterwards. The surgery is to make sure all of the internal bleeding is healing nicely, and fix up a bone they couldn't before, not when it had been as damaged as it had been. But now they were able with ease. The surgery goes fine, and the bets are on for when he'll be able to go home.

******

During the night of the recovery for the surgery, one of the nurses leaves a window open in the prepping room, causing cold air and winds, along with some rain, to travel though the recovery room they had assigned the boy. Jared wasn't allowed in there, no mater how hard he tried.

That morning, when the main nurse, Wendy, checks Jensen's vitals, she nearly has a heart attack herself. The boy has a fever of 104.3, and it's steadily rising. Calling for Doctor Beaver, he and three nurses, including Wendy, quickly try to get his temperature down. When Jared is informed of the fact that his boy is in a catatonic state, and may now have a higher risk of brain injury, the father can only fall into the chair Chad had gratefully set behind him.

All bets were off now for Jensen's well-being.

******

Jensen was brought back into ICU, breathing mask over his mouth, umping oxygen into his lungs because he can't do it himself; effects of that severe fever being the fact that Jensen couldn't get a breath in without it sounding like he was drowning. Only after using his police officer card does Jared get to be with him longer than visitor hours usually allow. The long-haired man was watching his son's chest rise and fall in sync with the machine, when his phone buzzes in his pocket. Sighing, Jared hesitates a second, before answering. Long enough for him to see the caller ID.

"Chad, I'm busy," the same gruff, hollow response to anyone who called that Jared managed to answer on time to. Usually people hung up with a measly, 'sorry' or just hanging up after he said anything. Today was not one of those days.

"I know, Jared," Chad says, "But this is important," Not moving his eyes from Jensen's chest, or his heart monitor, Jared sighs.

"Make it quick," Jared mutters.

"Our boys from uptown found Michael Weatherly's prints on the car that took Jensen," Weatherly, Jared had completely forgotten about him, much to his cop instincts' shame and fatherly instincts' annoyance.  

"They found him trying to take the car from the garage," Chad continues, oblivious to his partner's instincts' emotional battle. "We have him down in the holding cell now, to see if he knew about the kidnapping,"

Jared knew this was good news, to some extent. Weatherly was probably a part of that scheme, and with him under police watch it meant that they could question him on what he knew.

"We also got Morgan to talk," Chad says, sounding triumphant. "Now, if we can get Weatherly to talk, we can cross examine what they say about what went down,"

"S good, Chad," Jared murmurs, and though he means it, he just doesn't have time to wrap his head around this right now.

"Call me when you get something good," Not waiting for Chad's response, he hangs up, setting his phone back in his pocket. Sighing, the giant runs a hand through Jensen's hair; it was finally clean of all the blood and filth from before, along with the rest of him.

It's not that he didn't give a damn about what Chad said, it's just that he has more damns to give when it comes to his son.

******

Jensen felt weak, that was the first thing he realized when he could get a grip on himself. He felt weak, tired, and sore as hell. His chest felt like it was on fire, and he blindly thought about what Welling was going to-

 _Welling_ , Jensen thinks, snapping his eyes open and going to sit up, before falling back with a slight scream. God, that fucking _hurt_.

"Jensen?" green eyes flicker towards the place where the noise came from. His eye was still stinging, but now it was only a dull throb that Jensen could handle. Even if he couldn't see, it wouldn't have mattered. Jensen knew that voice without a figure.

_Dad._

******

Jared was dozing off, when he heard a change in the monitor that hadn't changed since his son fell ill. It was going a little faster than usual, and when Jared looked at Jensen's face he could see movement under the pale eyelids.

 _C'mon Jensen,_ Jared hopes silently, _open those eyes for me._

The shock of his boy actually opening his eyes hit Jared at possibly the worst but yet maybe the most cliché of times. Green eyes opened wide, before Jensen went to sit up. The boy let out a pained hiss, nearly a scream, before he fell back down to the pillows below him. The shock seemed to leave then when Jared realized it was _real_. Jensen was _awake_.

"Jensen?" he asks, eyes slightly wide, and he bites his lip; still worried Jensen wouldn't be okay. Jensen turns his head towards the sound of Jared's voice, with his eyes squinted slightly. His vision is still off, Jared thinks dumbly. Emerald green widen the best they can.

" _Dad,"_  

******

Considered well enough to leave as long as he takes antibiotics whenever he feels pain, Jensen is free to leave the hospital and into his father's care. In his truck, Jared slows down, and when Jensen looks up, he soon looks at his father with a raised eyebrow and question in his eyes.

"I didn't think we should go back to the house just yet," Jared says quietly. When all he gets is the raised eyebrow again, Jared explains.

"I mean, you need to relax, and be able to get around easier," The man bites his lip. "I figured a different scenery might be good, while you're healing," Hearing what his father says, Jensen hears the underlying messages, too.

_"I didn't think we should go back to the house just yet,"_ _**I don't think either of us are ready to face what happened there yet.** _

_"I mean, you need to relax, and be able to get around easier," **You need to be comfortable where you are, and the house won't be good for you.**_

_"I figured a different scenery might be good, while you're healing," **Getting away for a while might be good for us, you. Safer than town for a while.**_

No matter which way his father said it, Jensen would've agreed.

"Where would we go?" he asks quietly, looking up at Jared. Hesitantly, Jared bites his lip, before answering with a crooked smile.

"Y'know, your grandparents have been _begging_ to meet you..."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aha! There, another chapter done! any suggestion please comment them below and I'll put them into consideration. Next up, the plane ride to Texas, meeting Jared's parents, and a little moment between father and son that make them both realize their fears.. Please hang with me! :)


	17. Chapter 17

Jared asked Chad to help him pack bags for their flight down to Texas; not wanting Jensen to go back to the house when it was obvious to the father that he wasn't ready. Leaving Jensen in the care of Genevieve and Chris at the break-room at their own precinct. He hopes they're civilized...

"So, taking Jensen to meet Sherri and the ol' man, huh?" Chad asks as he grabs some of the teenager's clothes, folding them up neat- as neat as he knows how to- and setting them in the duffle Jared told him to use. His partner laughs, dropping his own duffle on the twin bed rearranging everything to make sure he isn't forgetting anything. 

"Yeah, we," pausing a second, Jared manages to catch Chad's eye. "We need to get away for awhile, y'know? And they've been begging to meet him practically since I got him," Normally Jared probably would've said 'dying to meet him', but after how close a call it was with his son, he'd rather not use that expression for awhile.

When everything is packed- Jared went back and packed what Chad didn't- the two men left with Harley and Sadie in the back of Jared's truck.

******

Harley and Sadie stay at Chad's, who always had a soft spot on animals. Genevieve gives both Jared and Jensen a hug goodbye, though the boy tenses at the touch- something he wouldn't have done if he hadn't been taken. Kane gives Jared a pat on the back and Jensen a book of crosswords for the flight, earning the young police sketcher a small, wry smile from Jensen.

The airport is busy as always, people coming from planes and heading for planes and flight attendants looking for their next flight. Jared keeps a hand on the small of Jensen's back as he limps his way through the gates, the boy ignoring the stares he's getting for having casts and bruises and cuts on his person. The ticket master gives the boy a lot of looks, but Jensen ignores them and Jared glares at her enough for her to blush and stammer out which direction their flight is.

Not even on the flight yet and Jared is regretting his decision not to drive.

******

The plane is just like any other, just a different signal and name painted on the side. Middle class seating has two aisles and two seats to each row, going back ten- making twenty. Jensen, still having childish soul inside him, calls dibs on the window seat, and makes his giant of a father take the aisle seat. An attendant comes along before the flight begins to ask passengers if they need anything, and Jensen asks for a bottle of water while Jared takes a cup of coffee. It's better than the station's.

Takeoff is slightly bumpy, causing a few people to either grip their armrests or the person next to them, and by the time the bird is in the air, flying steadily, Jensen has his crossword book out. Watching his son have slight trouble, Jared's eye catches nine down's question.

"Hey, Jen, read nine down," he murmurs, and hazel eyes watch as green take in the print. **Law and Order's Jack ______.** Smiling, the thirteen year old writes **McCoy** in a slim yet neat scrawl. Jensen seems to get the rest of the answers pretty quickly after that. Jensen finishes about two and a half crossword puzzles before he gets bored, so he resorts to watching out the window, looking at the clouds below them with slight awe.

Jared falls asleep after the buzz of chatter dulls down and the flight is going smoothly. By the time he wakes up, it's nearly time to land and Jensen asleep against him; having somehow managed to get himself under his father's right arm, head resting against Jared's collarbone and injured arm tucked against his chest. He's peaceful in his sleep, and hasn't gotten a single nightmare from the experience- a shock to everyone and yet also a concern for everyone as well. Genevieve suggests he's in a slight shocked period; unable to cope with it so his mind locks up the memory of anything that had happened. Kane argues that, doesn't see how he can manage that after having to see what they did to him in the mirror every day. Chad seems to be siding with both of tem, much to the sketch artist and psychologist's annoyance.

Jared himself doesn't really know what to believe in the scenario. Isn't sure if he should try to talk to the boy and ask him about what he remembers, or wait for Jensen in his own time. Act normal, as if nothing ever happened, or be a totally different way around Jensen because what happened _did_ happen?

These things Jared just didn't know.

******

They find their luggage pretty easily for an airport that's as busy as it is- Jensen's duffle right next to Jared's on the moving belt. Slinging the strap of his bag over his shoulder, Jared looks around for his brother, Jeff, who said he'd pick them up rather Sherri- to save Jensen from too many questions and Jared from getting hit with a wooden spoon their mother always seemed to have on her person. Looking around, Jared thinks he catches a glance of familiar shaggy hair and an even taller figure than him. With a tap to Jensen's good shoulder and a soft, 'over here,' to the boy, Jared makes his way towards the figure.

"Jeff?" he asks, about to touch the man's shoulder when a young woman suddenly launches herself into his arms, and he swings her around joyfully. Right, Jared thinks, Not Jeff then.

"Wasn't him," Jared says, turning around to shrug at Jensen but instead stops dead; heart plummeting for miles and blood freezing in his veins.

"Jensen?" he breathes, before swallowing- or attempting to past the lump in his throat. "Jensen!" he yells, looking around but unable to find familiar blonde hair or a child walking with a gait.

Rushing around, Jared stops short at seeing Jensen- not hurt anymore than he was, thank god- staring at a man kneeling next to him with a ball hat on. The fear the police officer had were slowly draining, but just drained into his protective instincts as he starts walking towards them.

"Who the hell are you?" he snaps, turning the guy around, only for him to stare at hazel eyes, dimples, and a familiar jaw structure.

"You know," Jeff starts, and Jared groans, letting go of his brother. "Your boy here is smarter than you are I think," the older Padalecki grins at his younger brother as he looks from Jared to Jensen. To most people, they didn't look alike much at all, but to the doctor, he could see where Jensen got his structure, at least. Sure, he was slender kind of like a girl and was terribly thin, but Jeff could see that he would bulk up and be like Jared when he got older.

******

Jeffrey Padalecki had been out in the Texas heat, waiting for his pain-in-the-ass little brother and his nephew, when he couldn't take the heat anymore. In a hoodie- real smart, Jeff- and dark blue jeans, he goes into the mildly air conditioned airport, looking around for people who just came off the flight from NYC to Texas.

He found the boy first; looking around with wide, terrified green eyes, and moving slowly, as if even though he wants to rush around, he's too sore to do so. Pausing only a moment, Jeff had walked over, ready to ask the kid what was wrong, when the teenager suddenly turned, staring up at him with huge green eyes-

_"So tell me what he looks like,"_

_"Oh, he's got big green eyes..."_

And a pale arm reach out to support himself from turning so fast-

_"He's pretty pale, for having lived in Texas..."_

And now yellow and purple bruises mattering his face, arms, neck-

_"God Jeff, they just... beat him to hell. Bruises everywhere..."_

Then Jeff knew. Without a doubt this was Jensen. His brother's Jensen. HIs nephew.

"Jensen," he says, only to cut short when the boy tenses all over, trying to back away and only managing to fall into one of the chair behind him. Raising his hands to show he had no weapons, Jeff had carefully made his way closer, until he'd been kneeling beside the boy.

"Do you know who I am?" Jeff questions softly, and Jensen's suddenly there; tilting his head up carefully with a smaller hand, eyes squinted to see better, and head tilted, as if concentrating hard.

"Dad's brother," the boy murmurs quietly, letting his hand fall and himself relax in the plastic chair he'd been sitting in. Jeff nods, slightly impressed that Jensen just managed to figure this all out by staring at him. Jeff won't admit it, but the staring was a little weird for him. Those green eyes made it feel like they were staring into the pits of his soul.

"Yeah, I'm Jeff," he says softly, shifting to balance on the heels of his feet as he continues to kneel next to his nephew. "'M your dad's older brother,"

"You lose Jared?" Jeff asked after a few minutes of them being silent, and Jensen bites his lip, before nodding; that worried and scared look back in his eyes.

"Hey, don't worry, we'll-"

"Who the hell are you?" a voice snapped, and when he was turned around forcefully, Jeffrey couldn't help but to grin.

******

"And that's what happened," Jeff finishes, looking at Jared, who's in the passenger seat of his car. His brother nods after a minute or so of mulling it over, before looking at Jensen through the rearview mirror. Jeff reaches over, squeezing Jared's shoulder.

"He's a brave kid, but I see what you're concerned about," he admits, and Jared looks at him, hazel eyes slightly wet and emotional.

"You're scared of losing him, because he isn't used to anyone but you," Jeff clarifies, and the young police officer nods.

"He's been through so much and he's only thirteen," Jared whispers, looking back at Jensen again, who's using his father's jacket as a pillow against the window as he sleeps.

"I didn't even know about him in his first thirteen years, and he didn't know me," Jared looks at his brother. "We're technically strangers but he feels safer with me than he has with anyone else he's ever been with,"

"Jeff that's not okay," Nodding, Jeff pulls up into a driveway, turning his keys and then the engine stops growling, leaving the two Padalecki men in silence besides the sounds of cicadas and crickets.

"I know it isn't right, and it probably never will be, but Jay, he's got you. And the guys from the station care about him, and I care about him and we only met like, an hour ago," Jared huffs a watery laugh, and Jeffrey smiles crookedly with a shrug that seems to say, 'well, it's true'.

"He's got family down here he's never even met or heard about, and they're already caring about him. This kid has tons of support to get him through,"

"You mean that?" Jared asks quietly, and Jeff nods, landing a hand on the police officer's knee, patting it twice softly.

"Every word,"

******

Jared wakes Jensen up while Jeff gets their bags for them, and Jared then leads his son up the steps leading to the house with a gentle hand on his shoulder. Once standing in front of the door, Jared glances at the boy.

"You ready?" Biting his lip, Jensen looks from the house, to the car; mentally trying to calculate how long it would take him to hotwire the car and drive away. He sighs then, looking up at his father, and, after a small shrug, nods slowly.

"Okay," Jared sets his hand on the small of Jensen's back, opening the door and making their way inside.

"Anybody home?"


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a few characters are mentioned during this chapter, and I'd like to say now that they were made in my own imagination, along with the plot of this story. I own nothing but the ideas for this story and it is purely for entertainment only. The characters mentioned- Lisa, Zach, and Allie- are made up as far as I am aware, and were my original people.

When Sherri Padalecki first saw Jensen, everything seemed to freeze. She knew of the incident. She was informed of what happened, and, although she braced herself; told herself she'd be ready to see the healed aftermath of what had happened, she wasn't. The bruises and casts and the never leaving layer of caution and fear in green eyes made her heart hurt. As much as she'd love to just rush forwards and hug the boy for hours, Sherri knew that look in her boy's eyes. The one that spoke of threat and promise if anything came to harm or scare Jensen at that moment. She'd seen it when Jared was almost twenty and met Megan's boyfriend. The mother saw it when Jared was watching Jeffrey's kids and a thunderstorm scared them enough to where Jared would fall asleep on his brother's couch with them crowded onto his chest, sleeping peacefully knowing Uncle Jay would protect them from the growling of the skies.

Sherri Padalecki saw it now, in the way Jared kept a hand on Jensen's back, as an anchor of the here and now. "About darn time you boys got here! I was startin' to think I'd need to send Gerri out for a search," she teases, and walks closer when Jared's hazel eyes relax.

"Mama, this is Jensen," Sherri nearly scoffs; this might be the first time they've met, but she _knows_ her grandson, dammit. When the boy holds out a hand in greeting, the woman takes it in both if hers, shaking it for a moment, but then just holding it, squeezing gently.

"Ma'am," he stammers quietly, and Sherri raises an eyebrow in good fun. "Oh please, hon, Sherri or Grandma will do just fine," smiling softly, the mother and grandmother squeezes his hand one more time, before releasing it.

******

Jensen knows, only an hour in, that his grandmother is probably the coolest lady he's ever met- besides Miss Gen, she doesn't count right now. She's sassy and smart yet warm and kind at the same time. She lets him help her cook because, and he quotes, ' _My Gerri can't cook for shit, and we both know JT here isn't kitchen smart. At all,_ ' And when his Uncle Jeffrey and feigned a hurt look, she said-

"And you, you giant, would eat everything while cooking it!"

The thirteen year old met Gerri Padalecki halfway through making dinner, when he shuffled into the kitchen, trying to sneak around the Mrs., and nearly succeeded. He snagged a dinner roll, winking at Jensen, before being whacked with what Jensen has come to know as the legendary wooden spoon.

"Sherri!" he had pouted, looking all of four years old when he was really in between fifty to sixty. Jensen couldn't help but to snicker under his breath, watching the scene under his bangs as he stirred the pot on the stove.

"Oh don't you whine, you'll ruin your supper," she says sternly, waving the spoon until he puts the roll back, muttering things to himself as he goes back to the den. Rolling her eyes, Sherri shrugs at Jensen, as if to say, 'What're you gonna do?' The boy grins at that, nodding while jutting his chin towards his father, who he'd hit with the spoon himself no more than fifteen minutes ago for trying to take a piece of meat from the cutting board.

"I see where he gets it," Jensen murmured quietly, nearly inaudible, but standing as close as she had dared, his grandmother had heard it. Laughing, she nods while wiping some flour off of her hands.

******

Uncle Jeffrey- or, as he likes to be called, Jeff- lives a few towns away from his childhood home, but still keeps in contact with his parents and siblings. He works for a hospital as an orthopedic surgeon, is up for promotion, and is married with two kids. Jensen was soon told about Lisa, Jeff's wife of four years and Allie and Zach, their children. Zach's nearing three, and Allie's only one and a half. Jensen can't help but to smile at the look Jeff gets in his eyes when he talks about his family; the fondness and love so obviously there.

He can't help but to wonder if anyone ever thinks about him like that.

******

Jared watches with slight amusement as he watches his older brother tell stories while eating dinner, waving his arms around sometimes enthusiastically, as if to make a point, and can't help but to smile. He knows Lisa. Has met her and loves her like a sister, and loves that little boy and girl like they're his own kids. The police officer knows what's in Jeff's similar hazel eyes when he talks about them. Fondness and love. Joy. Happiness with the fact that they're even in his life at all. That's what Jeffrey's feeling, and Jared only knows those feelings all too well, despite the short time he has.

It's the same look he gets, and the same things he feels, when he's talking about his son. When he's thinking about Jensen, that shiny ring of glimmering hazel goes into his eyes and he's been told that it's only there when something is concerning his son.

He can't help but to wonder if Jensen ever realizes he cares about him like that.

******

Gerri's entertaining his new grandson with stories of when his own boys were Jensen's age, and when he himself was the boy's age, while Jeff's talking with Lisa on the phone outside, and Jared is helping his mother with the dishes.

"So," Sherri starts while washing a plate, before handing it to Jared, who starts to dry it with a towel, eyebrow raised.

"So?" he parrots, while his mother only hands him another dish.

"He's a god boy, JT," she says quietly, pausing a moment when childish laughing can be heard faintly; very quietly. Warm brown eyes watch as her son's hazel fill with a ring of glimmering hazel, as if a different shade, go around the orbs. Love, she thinks. It's the only word to describe it with.

"Yeah, he is," Jared says thickly, swallowing as he turns back to the dishes he needs to dry. Blinking a few times herself, Sherri turns off the kitchen sink, drying her hands on a few paper towels.

"You'll be sleeping in your old room, and Jensen can have Megan's," Despite it once being pink, Megan's old room had been redone completely when she moved out, becoming a spare bed for anyone who visits, but still with a few family photos hanging up on the walls. Jared nods, okay with that situation. His room was upstairs and all the way at the end of the hall, to the right. While Meggie's old room was all the way down the hall, opposite side, on the right. They were a bigger difference than his and Jen's rooms at his house back in New York, but he'd leave his door open for the boy in case he needed anything.

******

"I'm leaving my door open if you need anything, alright?" Jared tells Jensen on their way up the stairs to go to bed. Jeff had crashed not long after the phone call to Lisa and the kids; ruffling Jensen's hair, patting Jared's shoulder, kissing Sherri's cheek and clapping Gerri's shoulder on his way to his old room. Sherri soon after, saying she was going to get up early tomorrow and make breakfast, and Gerri following her, claiming he was too old for this time of night.

After a few reruns of, of course, _Law & Order_, Jensen quietly whispered to his father that he wanted to go to bed. 

Jensen nods, walking to where Megan's old room is, before shutting his door behind him.

Sighing, Jared leaves the hallway bathroom light on just in case, and his door cracked. On occasion, he used to do the same for his little sister. No different now. Shucking his jeans and shirt, Jared changes into boxers and a light gray wife-beater, before turning out his bedroom light, crawling under the sheets but pushing the blankets down to his feet. It was humid and hot, too hot for Jared.  _Also good nights for storms_ , Jared thinks blindly as he drifts off to sleep.

******

 _Laughing and pain._ That's all Jensen can think about. Someone's laughing, Laughing at him. And the pain. God, it hurts too much.

_Help me, please._

Oh Jensen, you just don't get it, do you? Your mom never wanted a child. You ruined her life, so it's only fair she ruined yours.

_No.. I- I didn't..._

Oh but you did, didn't you? _Mom?_   You never even realized that your father doesn't want you? _You're wrong. He cares about me._

Sweetheart, he's yanking your chain. The image of his mother goes through him, and she's smiling. Jensen feels a shiver go through him when Jared suddenly appears, wrapping an arm around Darcie's waist, kissing her neck lightly.

"He's still here?" he asks, sounding pissed and annoyed. Darcie simply smiles ruefully, handing Jared a small box.

"W-What's that?" Jensen can't move, can barely breathe, as he watches his father, the first person who's ever shown him a single kindness or care, pulls a gun from the box.

"Dad." Jensen's eyes are wide with fear, and the taunting laughs are echoing throughout the darkness; his mother's, father's, JD's, Weatherly's, and Tom Welling's. They're long and loud and cruel, making fun of him and taunting what he could never do, and what he can.

"Useless,"

"Unloved,"

"Bad,"

"You're so worthless, Jensen,"

"Why are you even still here?" Jared walks up, aiming the gun at the boy's chest; ignoring his pleads and the tears running down his face.

"I wish you had never been born." Jared whispers in Jen's ear, cold and not a single emotion besides hatred can be heard.

The weird ring of hazel Jensen had noticed was always in his father's eyes... Wasn't there...

Jared pulls the trigger-

" **Dad!** "


	19. Chapter 19

**"Dad!"**

Jared jumps up in bed, looking around frantically until it occurs to him where the sound came from. Megan's old room. Jensen. Running from his bed and throwing the covers off in the process, Jared runs down the hall in big, non-caringly loud steps, until he gets to the room with a faded pink door. Opening it, Jared stops at what he sees.

Jensen's covered in sweat, shirt drenched, as he thrashes around on the mattress, trying to push off whatever's hurting him in his mind. Frozen for only a second, the father goes into the room, kneeling on the bed and over Jensen as he tries to wake him up from the nightmare. He knew it was only a matter of time before his son broke. Jensen may be strong but sooner or later than strength wears out when the pain on your shoulders is too big to carry alone.

"Jensen! It's okay, you're dreaming, buddy; wake up!"

******

_The gun didn't work. Jensen can feel the pain of the bullet and can see the smoke from the gun, but he's still standing. Jared doesn't look too pleased about that. HIs father grips his wrists on the wrong side of too tight, holding him down no matter how hard he thrashes to get away as Welling steps up. He's got the evil sneer that used to give a little boy with huge green eyes and hay-blonde hair nightmares he couldn't run to his Mama about; knowing she'd get mad and make him spend more 'work time' with Welling._

_"Stop!" the shout goes ignored, and as Welling gets closer Jensen feels trapped, and pure unfiltered terror start to fill within him._

_"Dad!"_

******

"Dad!" the scream causes Jared's heart to hurt a bit more as his efforts to wake his son don't work. The scream just before it had Jared carefully releasing Jensen's wrists, scared of the boy hurting himself if he didn't let his wrists go. The door is slowly pushed open, and Jared glances up and to the right to see his mother, father, and brother standing there; all their eyes wide and surprised and the scene before them. When Jared looks back down to his son when he thrashes again, trying to soothe him, Jeff wastes no time walking further into the faded pink room, intending to help his brother wake his nephew.

"No!" Jensen's voice cracks at the end, and when he thrashes Jared's there to gently restrain his arms so he won't knock down the lamp while Jeff carefully presses his legs down when they try to kick someone or something that will cause harm. Wiping sweat from is neck, Jeff watches as Jared tries to calm Jensen with words.

Jeffrey, like Jared, had woken up to the sounds of a scream. He'd jumped out of bed and opened his bedroom door, and, after seeing a blur of hair and muscle run down the hallway and towards Meggie's old room, the oldest brother had run after him when he heard the scream of 'Stop!' and another, 'Dad!'.

Sherri had woken up to a pair of feet thumping on the floor above her room, and then not long after, another pair of footsteps bounding to the end of the hallway just as loud as the first. It brought her back tot times when Jared and Jeff were little kids and would chase each other around, but that quickly vanished when she heard muffled screams coming from where she knew her daughter's old room used to be. Pausing a moment to throw on a robe, she then slaps her husband's shoulder. Gerri stirs weakly, glancing at her through sleep-dulled eyes.

"Gerri," she hisses, eyes wide as another muffled scream echoes. "Something's wrong upstairs! We have to see what's wrong," Sherri shakes him until he wakes up completely, before they make their way up the stairs. They run into Jeff, who's hesitating at the door.

And there they were, watching the scene unroll before them.

******

_Jensen, c'mon this has to be some kind of dream. Wake yourself up! Do it, Jensen, do it!_

"Jensen, it's just me. It's just me, wake up!"

_Welling's carving into his chest with knives and his own nails. Jensen screams in pain, back arching off the floor where he's being held down. His mother laughs cruelly, leaning down next to Jensen's ear to whisper-_

_"You will never be loved, Jensen. Never be wanted, or loved by anyone; especially not your father, or me," Tears spring into the green eyes of the thirteen year old, and he chokes on the tears he tries hard to keep back._

_"No-"_

"-oo!" Jensen jumps up in the bed, sitting up quickly before he runs into a mass of warm muscle. Shaking, the boy barely notices as arms wrap around his waist and shoulders, pulling him closer to the mass of muscle he blindly realizes is his father.

"Shh, Jensen; I've got you, I've got you," Jared breathes, arms around his son. The boy is practically shaking out of his skin, and Jared pulls him even closer; one hand on the back of Jensen's head, fingers threading through the blonde locks growing there, and the other on his back, rubbing slow, soothing circles. Neither of them hear the click of the door being shut, but they both realize that suddenly they're alone. Jensen's taking shaky breaths, trying to relax though he remains tense in Jared's arms.

"M so sorry," he stammers, looking up at Jared with watery, red-rimmed eyes. "M sorry, I'm so s-sorry..." Frowning, Jared pulls Jensen back so he can see him clearly.

"No," the young father shakes his head, and then gently puts his hand over the boy's mouth when he opens it to protest.

"Jensen, you have nothing to be sorry for, okay?" Jared shakes his head again. " _Nothing_. At all. None of this is your fault and I'd never blame you for it," Green eyes look down, and he bites his lip as Jared removes his hand.

"But I'm ruining your life," the words were almost never heard, had they been quieter and had Jared been further away.

"What?" Jared's eyes widen as he looks at the boy nearly in his lap but won't meet his gaze. Lifting his son's chin up, Jared looks at him while mustering up all the emotions he can in his eyes when green meets his hazel. And that special golden hazel ring that Jensen noticed was always in his father's eye is nearly a second ring it's so big.

"Jensen, before you came into my life... It was dull and lonely; like a broken record player on repeat. I did the same thing every day, and that was just work with nothing to come home to at night but the dogs. And when you showed up everything changed," Flinching a little, Jen tries to turn his head away, but his father cups it in his huge hands, and he remains still.

"When you came into my life I realized just how much I was missing out on. How much I really needed someone around that I cared about. Of course I care about Harley and Sadie, but they can't talk, and I can't have a legitimate talks with them. Jensen, _you_ are exactly what I needed in my life all those years,"

"Someone to talk to, someone to care about... Something I'd be excited and always happy to get home to. You, you are that for me."

"Why?" Jensen asks, no louder than a whisper as he looks at Jared, face still framed in the man's giant paws.

"Because I love you."

"You.. You love, me?" Jared smiles softly, and nods.

"I love the way you're shy, but brave enough to overcome it around new people, and the way you can cook when you're the age of how many years I've been trying," That gets Jared a crooked smile. "I love the way you bond with the dogs, and talk to them like they're people. I love the way you're smart enough to figure out who did it on any episode of _Law and Order_ we watch. And the way your eyes shine with something that is so hard to explain but so easy for me to recognize,"

"I love you, Kiddo," Jared finishes, smiling wider when Jensen does with watery eyes. "And I don't want just a measly two months with you; I want you to live with me until you get tired of my shit and need to move out for college or something," Huffing a wet, shaky laugh, Jensen lets Jared wipe the tears from his face before he wraps his arms around the man's neck. As Jared hugs him back, Jensen tells Jared what he had wanted to for a while, but had been too afraid to do so until now.

"I love you too,"


	20. Chapter 20

Jensen falls asleep on Jared that night, never seeming to be satisfied when Jared tried to move away, so the father just settled on the bed; Jensen curled into his chest and breathing finally even and deep. There were still dried tear tracks down his face, but those could wait until morning to deal with.

******

When Jensen wakes up, he feels... Safe. Protected. And when he opens his eyes he understands why. Jared's got his arms around him protectively, while the boy is resting his head on Jared's chest; able to hear the steady beating of his heart.

Then he remembers the night before.

His dad loves him. As in, won't make him go away after the second month is over. As in, likes every odd flaw Jensen has and will one day get. As in...

And Jensen loved him too. He's the best parent Jensen could've asked for. God knows Darcie was a lost cause and always would be but Jared? He didn't have to take him in, but he did. That makes Jensen feel... good inside.

Quietly slipping out of the bed so his dad won't wake up, Jensen winces internally at the still sweat drenched t-shirt he has on. Scanning the room, he finds an old sweatshirt in the closet, and slips it on. It's a lot bigger than him, and Jensen doesn't think it would have ever fit his aunt, so he figures it's either Uncle Jeff's or his Dad's.

Grandma Sherri is in the kitchen after he goes to the bathroom and tiptoes down the stairs out of habit, and she finally catches him in her gaze when the second tile to the kitchen creaks loudly. She smiles sweetly, showing no sign of knowing what had happened last night.

"Good morning, sweetheart," she greets when Jensen slowly shuffles over to her. He smiles his 'good morning' at her before turning to where she's got bacon sizzling on the stove and a bowl of eggs in needing to be whipped on the counter.

"Wanna help me make French toast?" she asks with a grin, and Jensen nods, grabbing a whisk and starting with the already broken eggs.

******

Sherri can see the dark circles under his eyes, and the paleness of his skin. She can see his body tensed and ready to bolt and his eyes flickering to her and around them, before back to his task at hand. It hurts her ol' heart to see her grandson like this; so... tired, and broken for his age.

 _"He's thirteen, Mama,"_ Jared had told her over the phone. _"He doesn't talk to me much, and Sadie has a new favorite now,"_

Sadie, Sherri smiles at the thought of the dog Jared had gotten. She'd been with him at the time, telling him that Harley needed a playmate while Jared worked nightshifts and odd hours, when they had nearly hit her on the back roads when they were nearing the Pennsylvania border. Much too thin and far too afraid of everything, they had nearly left her.

Sherri's glad they didn't. It took a lot of patience- not her youngest son's strong suit- and gentle things before Sadie had opened up. And now, she's still her calm self, but doesn't shy away from touches or loud noises. Doesn't shake more than a terrified Chihuahua on a caffeine buzz when people are around her. And the more Sherri thought, the more she realized why exactly Jensen was her new favorite.

Sadie has been through what Jensen's been through. Somehow that dog knows that sweet boy is just like what she used to be; broken, scared, and haunted of the past no one can relate to. Sadie never had someone who could, in a sense, relate to the pain of what she went through.

Until Jensen. Now Sherri understood. Sadie was doing what Jared and Chad and even Sherri had been doing for her. Providing their own silent comfort for something they couldn't understand.

Smiling to herself, Sherri puts more bacon on the pan sitting atop the stove.

******

When Jared woke up it was to the smell of food, the sizzling of bacon, and the immediate fear in his chest when he didn't see Jensen in the bedroom. He saw the door partly cracked, and stands quickly, tripping over the sheets and blanket in his haste to get down the stairs. Feet pounding on the floor and heart thudding in his chest, Jared stops at what he sees in the kitchen.

Jensen is at the stove, next to his Mama, cooking something with a lot of batter. He keeps glancing around the place, back tense and hands shaky. Stepping into the kitchen, Jared's mother catches sight of him first.

"Well, nice of you to join us," she teases, and Jensen glances at him with a crooked smile. Jeff is at the table, nursing a cup of coffee while Gerri has on his reading glasses as his eyes skim the paper in his hands.

"Food's almost ready, Jay; get your ass to the table," heeding his mother's warnings, the police officer sits across from his brother and diagonal from his father, who was sitting at the end of the table.

Jensen helps bring the food to the table, before sitting down next to Jared when everything's set and ready to be eaten. The Padalecki brothers hound most of the eggs, bacon, and hash browns with the help of their father, and the amusement to Sherri and Jensen. The thirteen year old gets down three slices of bacon, a quarter of his eggs and no browns; eating even less than his grandmother. When Jeff is in the shower, Gerri is getting dressed and Sherri is cleaning up, Jared finally gets a minute alone with his son.

"Jensen," he sits next to him from where Sherri had forced him to sit down in the living room to 'relax'. Looing at Jensen, Jared smiles a bit when he sees his old high school sweatshirt on him. He'd given it to Megan when he moved out, and didn't think she had kept it.

"Do you remember last night?" the boy nods slowly, taking a moment to move closer to Jared before continuing.

"You really love me?" he asks quietly, and Jared nods, murmuring, "I really do,"

"'Nd you won't give me away?" Wrapping an arm around Jensen's shoulders, Jared smiles against the boy's temple.

"Not until I absolutely have to, Jense,"

******

Jared gets in the shower after Jeff does, leaving the boy alone with his uncle and grandfather while Sherri does some errands for dinner. It's almost an awkward silence, the three males glancing at each other before quickly moving their eyes to something else when someone notices. Surprisingly, Jensen breaks the silence.

"Was.. Uh.." he swallows, glancing at Jeff. "Was Dad always so..." he waves his hand in the air in a circular rotation, obviously trying to find the right words.

"Spazzy?" Jeff finishes, before nodding with a grin. "Oh yeah, I remember one time when he was seven; he ate glitter, and then burped it up the next day," At Jensen's amused look, Jeff huffs a laugh.

"He thought it was the coolest thing," Gerri snorts, chuckling as he glanced to his grandson.

"One time he tried climbing up the Ferris wheel when the fair was in town," the oldest man rolls his eyes. "Scared Sherri half to death,"

Seeing the looks in both his Uncle Jeff and Grandfather's eye, Jensen lets a slow, yet shy, smile start to form. He had a feeling story time was only just starting.

******

Jared heard barely there, congested wheezing from the living room, and the first thing that flashed in his mind was _Dad's having a heart attack_. Dashing down the stairs he soon learned that wasn't the case, but even then another panicked thought flashed. _Jensen's dying again_.

The boy was doubled over, one arm trying to hang on to the ottoman for the sofa but failing, considering he was already on the floor. His face was redder than its ever been and there were tears streaming down his face as he tried to get a breath in in-between his wheezing and coughing.

And when Jared saw Jeff and his dad just standing there, he kind of lost it. Just a little. Honest.

"What the _hell_ do you think you're doing? Just standing around while he's like this?" He all but shouts, kneeling next to Jensen and lifting him up, so he's resting against Jared's chest halfway, the rest of him- which is just his legs- across the living room carpet.

"Jensen, are you okay?" checking over his son frantically, he pauses when there's a sudden hand clenching the fabric of his tee-shirt.

"Y-you..." Jensen takes a deep breath, or at least tries, before continuing. "You really-"

He cuts himself off, going into another fit of... hysterical _laughter?_

Jared looks up at his father and brother, giving them a look that's a mixture of bitch-face and total confusion. Jeffrey actually steps forward, a sheepish grin on is features as he rubs the back of is neck.

"We uh... Told him the Georgia story.." Jared feels his ears and cheeks burn hot, and Jensen's laughter echoes through his ears. It's one of the first real genuine, not holding back laughs Jared's heard since the accident. And if his own mortification and humiliation is the price to seeing his son on the road to recovery?

Then is was well worth it.


	21. Chapter 21

Jared and Jensen leave after two and a half weeks of staying with the older Padalecki's. Jeff drives them to the airport, carrying their bags while Jared helps Jensen out of the car and into the building. Jared shakes his older brother's hand at the gates, giving him a one-armed hug as well. Jensen hugs Jeff goodbye, much to the shock of Jeff, and a mere fond and amused smile from Jared.

"Don't be a stranger," Jeff murmurs gruffly, when, after Jensen had turned his back to grab a carry on, the oldest Padalecki quickly wiped the sheen of wetness from his eyes.

No, they weren't tears- he was sweating from his eyes, okay? Jeez. Jared nods at his words, hand on Jensen's shoulder as they bid goodbye one last time.

******

Jared was nervous. Not about the plane ride- no, it seemed that Jensen was fine with flying, and Jared himself had flown many times. That wasn't the problem. The problem was that Jared still didn't know if Jensen was ready to go back to the house. That's where Jensen was fucking _kidnapped_. Drugged and kidnapped before being tortured for three days straight. The dogs were still sometimes hesitant to go to a few rooms, so Chad said when he came to pick them up the day the boys left for Texas.

Even when Jensen falls asleep against him quarter-way through the flight, Jared-- who'd been running on coffee for the last fifteen hours-- couldn't sleep a wink. He tried the airsickness pills his Dad had given him, to no avail. He tried the pillows and the weird 'soothing' music in the ear buds, but that didn't work either. Jensen had been worried he'd get more nightmares after the first one, so Jared would always sit with him until he was in a deep sleep; and even then, ended up crashing net to him due to it being so late. When they left Sherri had folded up Jared's old hoodie, and had secretly stuffed it into Jensen's suitcase before they left for the airport. Neither Jensen nor Jared realized this until Jensen went looking for his crossword book.

When he saw the hoodie, the puzzle book was long forgotten and instead Jensen had thrown the material on over his head, before curling into his seat and falling asleep; his head on Jared's shoulder.

Watching his son breathe normally, despite the few barely there bruises on his skin, Jared felt some of his original wariness and fright disappear. Even if the thirteen year old wasn't ready- hell, if Jared wasn't ready (which he wasn't)- the police officer would still stand by his son. Through whatever hell is thrown at them whether it's the middle of the night or smack in the middle of their day. They'd get through.

Jared would make sure of it.

******

Jensen is still sleep-groggy when the plane lands, so a very amused Jared leads him to the car they have. Slamming the trunk down once all their stuff is inside, Jared sits in the back with Jensen as the cabbie drives out into traffic. Taking a shaky breath before releasing it, Jared watches out his window while tuning out the cabbie's rambling voice talking to them as if they tourists. The father just hopes to everything nice in the world that he knows what he's doing.

******

Jensen watches his Dad out of the corner of his eye as the taxi takes them home. He know he's nervous about it. Hell, Jensen is, too. The more the teenager thinks about it, about what he's going home to, it makes him want to crawl back to that plane and sleep for a few years.

 _Worthless_...

_No good, Jensen. It's why Jared isn't looking for you. No one will ever want you, unless they need a punching bag._

_Now, now Jensen, do you really think you could leave us? Ever?_

_If I never wanted you then why would your Father? He's the reason you're in this mess in the first place!_

_He'll never want you...Never want you... Want you..._

_You're better off dead._

Jensen shuts his eyes tight, swallowing a few times and letting out a shaky sigh before he opens them again. Looking back out the window, he watches as the number of skyscrapers become less and less and the number of simple houses and fields becomes greater.

They're almost home. Glancing back to his father, Jensen watches as he runs a hand through his hair and bites his lip. The cabbie soon enough pulls into the drive, parking while Jared gets their bags. Jensen opens his door, stepping out of the car while adjusting his hold on the book-bag he'd kept with him through the plane ride and the drive. Looking up the driveway and to the porch, all the way to the front door, Jensen's eyes suddenly glaze over a bit, but he keeps walking. He can hear his Dad pay the driver, murmuring quietly to him to 'keep the change, it was a long drive'.

He tries to open the door, but has to wait for Jared to do that- he's the one with the keys. The boy jumps a bit when  bigger hand lands on his shoulder. Hazel eyes peer down at him with concern in their gaze, but Jensen's eyes remain set in the area that seems to be between 'nervous' and 'brave'.

Jared's never been prouder.

******

Jensen seems okay, Jared thinks to himself. _But then again, he seemed fine the first night at Ma and Dad's_ , another voice in his head reminds bitterly. Shaking away those thoughts, Jared sets the bags down on the floor where the kitchen connects to the living room, before looking around.

The dog bowls aren't there, and neither are the beds they never seem to use.  Harley's dark blue leash is missing from it's spot on the counter, and Sadie's favorite toy- a white and black knot with a rope tied to it- isn't there.

Chad must not have dropped them off yet, Jared reminds himself. His cop partner had said sometime around 'the afternoon'. Well, the native Texan and New Yorker each had different ideas of 'the afternoon'. To Chad, it was around three to six, the usual time when he gets to go to the bar near the precinct and eat lunch. Flirt with a few bartenders. In Jared's mind, the afternoon was eleven to one, since he's used to getting up early and using that time before it to work out and get ready for the day.

Sighing to himself, Jared walks into the living room, ready to go upstairs to take a shower when he hears said shower door slam shut. Jensen. Rushing up the stairs, Jared gently taps on the door.

"Kiddo, you okay in there?" Jared asks, just as the shower faucets turn on, splashing against the bottom on the tub.

"Takin' a shower now!" the boy shouts back, and his father walks back down the stairs.

Seeing no point in doing nothing while there's things he could be doing, Jared grabs Jensen's duffle bag, and, after looking around and not being able to find his, he just takes Jensen's book-bag as well and heads up the stairs. The boy must've brought the wrong duffle into the bathroom with him.

******

Jensen thought he'd be okay. He thought that if he turned on the loud fan in the bathroom and then let the shower run the thoughts and voices of memories would fade and leave him.

But they didn't.

Jensen panics a bit, tears stinging the back of his eyes in sadness and frustration. He just wants to forget. Turning the water on the coldest setting, he shuts the curtains and sits in the shower with his clothes still on. The boy pulls his legs to his chest, one arm going around his knees. _Worthless, Jenny._ It occurs to him then suddenly that he brought his father's duffle in with him, and not his own. Well that's just great, he thinks bitterly. Because he can't just walk back down the stairs soaking wet in his clothes without an alibi. Dad will get suspicious.

Wait. Dad's bag.

Pulling back the curtains, Jensen quickly unzips the bag, digging through it the best he can without soaking everything, before finding what he was looking for.

Before Jensen finds what he thinks he _needs_.

 _Come on, sweetheart, we all know you' don't mean anything to your Dad._ Darcie's voice laughs in his head as the teenager sits back down in the freezing shower, drawing the curtains forwards so they'll hide everything. _Jenny, Jenny, Jenny,_ Welling mocks. That same icy, sleek voice sending chills down Jensen's spine without the need of help from the water raining down. _Daddy ain't comin' for you. Why would he? For something like you? You're **nothing** to him. _

As Jensen grips the hard plastic device in his hands, he shuts his eyes tight and flashes of those three days overcome his mind.

Welling, his mother, JD, everything. The beatings, the scary, dark car ride. Laughing, the cruel laughing. The _pain._ Oh god, could Jensen feel the phantom pain of every punch. Every kick, and jab, hit. Every whip. Every everything.

He presses the object in his hand closer. Tighter. And suddenly he can feel the phantom pain grow to something more. Something he's used to.

 _That's it, Jensen,_ Welling murmurs, and Jensen gasps in shock, a guttural scream escaping his throat.

He drops the dark blue razor he'd took from his father's bag.

******

Jared was rushing up the steps before the scream even ended. Terror in his chest and worry deep in his throat. It felt like it was choking him, and Jared turns the door knob-

Only for it not to turn.

_Locked._

_"Jensen!"_


	22. Chapter 22

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys!! I am SO sorry for the long delay. Please don't hate me XD Okay, I hope everyone has a great thanksgiving, and if I don't hear from you guys by December, have a happy Christmas too!
> 
> WARNING--- THIS CHAPTER CONTAINS SOME THINGS THAT MAY BE TRIGGERING TO OTHERS. WARNING YOU NOW BECAUSE I CARE.

" _Jensen!"_ Jared tries the doorknob again, somehow thinking in his panic-riddled mind that it would suddenly open, but that doesn't seem to be the case at all. It still doesn't turn. Jensen is silent now, and Jared panics even more. The shower is still running, but there's no other noise that can be heard.

"Jensen, open the door!"

******

Jensen takes terribly shaky and audible breaths, but due to the shower's rushing water, it isn't audible on the other side of the door. The water is freezing cold, but Jensen can't even feel it anymore. The boy is deeply numb, eyes just barely clear and skin pale. Lips tinged blue because of the water, and sitting under it too long. He blindly wonders just how long he's been in the bathroom, let alone the shower, but the pounding on the door stalls the thought.

"Jensen open the door!" _Dad_ , he thinks absently, the previous thought long gone now. Jensen stands slowly in the shower, water still running. Blood is still slowly dripping from his wrist and his two hands, from where he'd pressed the razor too deep into his skin while being trapped in the bad memories of Tom Welling. The dark blue plastic device is lying over the drain a bit water running into it and washing away the crimson that had stained its metal blades. A familiar sting of tears suddenly appears into Jensen's green eyes, and soon enough he cant bring himself to sand anymore; too worn, and cold, and _tired_. He slides down the shower wall he'd currently been sitting against, head resting back against the even colder tiles, and cries.

Loud, heart-wrenching cries that wrack his body and cause Jen to choke on each one; making the process rinse and repeat. Cry, choke on the sob, sob even harder. HE wants to stop, but at the same time he can't bring himself to realize what he _wants_ to stop, and what he _needs_ to stop. His light blue jeans are now dark and soaked, along with his shirt. He'd taken his father's hoodie off before he'd gotten into the shower, and his bare feet are freezing and pale, along with his arms and the rest of his body. His dark blonde hair is plastered to his face, bangs running into his eyes and causing water to run into them and down his face.

Jensen's tears burn as they slide down his face and on to the bottom of the tub. They burn his arms when he buries his face into his arms and pulls his legs up to his chest to try and stifle the noise. Mind flashing back to the night with Welling, when he'd cried for everything he'd gained since he left San Antonio, and everything he'd never gotten to do or say, Jensen thinks that right now is something like this. He knows what he has, and has said everything he'd wished to say. But he hasn't done everything he's wanted to.

But when you're being haunted by your past, and the voices ringing through your thoughts cause mental torment, Jensen thinks blindly right then that he doesn't  _want_ to stick around if this is in store for him for the rest of his life. Welling and his mother, JD or Weatherly, having a fifty percent chance of coming back into his life somehow, and taking everything he'd ever wanted away... Jensen would rather die.

His sobs continue as these thoughts run through him, wracking his body as he tries to decide if life is worth living, if it comes with being haunted by a past he cannot escape.

******

'Fuck it' has always been some sort of personal motto for Jared. Ever since he was a little kid, he'd always kind of figured; Do now, think later. He always thought that actions were the way to go, not words. Mostly because he could never be as supportive in some speech faster than he could with a hug or some sort of action. It was something that made the police officer.. himself. It made Jared, Jared Padalecki.

He'd grown up with that motto, and it runs through his mind as he kicks his bathroom door down to get to his son.

"Jen.." he trails off, throat going dry and heart clenching at the sights before him. Jensen is sobbing against the wall of the shower, soaking wet with his clothes still on, and shower still hitting his body with sharp pellets of water. The water rushing towards the drain is pink, and Jared doesn't need to be a genius to know what it is, or where it came from. Especially after he sees his duffle on the floor of the bathroom, and the razor lying mere feet away from his son.

"Jensen," Jared kneels next to the tub, turning the knobs of the shower and swallowing when it goes silent, besides the choked gasps and sobs coming from the thirteen year old in front of him. Lips tinged blue and skin white, hair stuck to his face and wrists stained crimson, Jensen's green eyes look up to meet his father's. And Jared doesn't know whether to cry in relief or sadness that those green eyes are still clear with thought and peace of mind.

He lets a few tears fall either way, as he lifts his son out of the tub, grabbing the towel and putting it over Jensen's head, drying his hair quickly but gently. The police officer moves down, gently taking the boy's wrists and turning them palm up, so he gets a better look at the damage done to them. Jared presses part of the towel against his left wrist firmly, murmuring a soft 'sorry' when Jensen flinches.

"C'mon," Jared says, when Jensen's wrists are bandaged up firmly and he finally gets him into something dry.

"We need to talk."

******

Jensen's been staring at his Father for the last twenty minutes, watching his very move as he apparently tries to make a hole in the living room rug. Chad had been called by Jared moments before Jensen and he went downstairs. Being told that he might need his friend to watch Harley and Sadie for one mire night if he didn't call back before ten. Now here they were, Jensen still staring as Jared preps himself for saying something.

"Jensen..." He starts, before stopping, running a hand through his hair, and pacing again. It's been like this for fifteen of the twenty.

"I think, you need to talk to someone," he says finally, and Jensen looks away after a short pause and withdrawn breath. He clasps his hands in his lap, staring at his feet and biting his lip. Unaware that his father has moved closer until he feels a warm hand cupping his chin, tilting his face up gently to stare up into soft hazel eyes.

"I called Genevieve already, Jensen," staring up at Jared, Jensen's eyes go slightly wide with surprise. He didn't think he Dad would've called... And even if he did he never thought he would've told..

"I didn't tell her what happened today," Jared says, as if able to read his son's thoughts. "But I did tell her about the nightmares you had while we were in Texas."

With a sigh, Jared sits down next to his son, wrapping an arm around his shoulders and bringing him close to his side. Running a hand through dark blonde hair, Jared sighs again. Jensen just watches.

"I know what you're going through isn't something that you just get over, or something you might even forget in time," he says quietly. "But I also know that keeping your thoughts in, and letting it tear you apart from the inside out because you don't wanna tell anyone is not going to help you at all." Jensen bites his lip, looking away again.

"It helps me-"

"The hell it does, Jensen Ross." No one's ever pulled the middle name card on him before, and because of it Jensen almost forgot he had one. But snapping his shocked gaze back to his Father's heated one, he swallows. Knowing that his lie wasn't bought.

"It doesn't help you at all. It makes you worse and you know it," Texas twang and slurs are more evident in Jared's voice now, but Jensen isn't afraid. He knows that his dad isn't mad at him, per se. No, his worry and concern and fear are making him mad at the world. Mad at Welling. At everything right now. But not pinpointed at him.

"It makes you more withdrawn than ever, an' less talkative. Makes ya push people 'way and for eleven or so years, it's worked. People have bought the 'I'm fine' card form you. But now it ain't gonna work no more because I can see right through it." Hazel eyes filled with fire suddenly die out, leaving hazel eyes that remind Jensen of summer days spent around a campfire with people you love.

"I love you, Jensen. You're my son, and I care about you more than anythin'. I hate to see you be 'fraid of everything and anyone because you won't let anyone in," Jared runs a hand through his dark brown hair, sighing again. Looking down at Jensen, he gently encases his son's slim wrist, the one with the more worse injury.

"I don't want you to hurt yourself, mentally or physically," he murmurs, voice low and deeply baritone. "Promise me you'll either tell me or Genevieve, or both of us, if you're feeling something you don't like," Jensen looks away again, but his father's free hand is there to lift his chin back up.

"Promise me, Jensen?" Biting his lip and mulling over his thoughts, Jensen slowly nods, wiping his eyes from the slight wetness that had formed during the moment. "Yeah," he whispers back, leaning against his dad with his head on the cop's shoulder.

"I promise."


	23. Chapter 23

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So sorry for the delay, I was gone longer than expected. I hope everyone had a great holiday this past week, and a great New Year soon!
> 
> ALSO- THIS CHAPTER- THOUGH NOT LIKELY- STILL MAY BE TRIGGERING TO OTHERS. IT'S A WARNING TO Y'ALL NOW.

"So how'd he do today?" Jared asks quietly as Genevieve walks over to him. Jensen having gone to see if Kane was around, always liking the young man's company. Big brown eyes look up at the Texan, before the owner of said eyes shrugs sadly, sighing.

"He opened up a little bit, on past experiences back in Texas," she starts, as if Jared asked to hear the good news before the bad news. "But nothing about the current situation; nothing about nightmares, or thoughts, fears... nothing, Jared." The father runs a hand through his shaggy hair, watching his son as he finally sees Kane, walking over to the police sketcher and sitting next to him. But of course, at a fair distance.

Since the incident with the razor, Jensen seems more talkative if Jared asks how he's feeling, or things of that nature. But then at the same time, it's almost like he's cheating the system. He'll talk about past experiences when still living with his mother and her friends, but then refuses to talk about anything recent. And Jared's almost embarrassed enough to admit he didn't even see this scenario coming. Jensen is smart, and knows how to trick people and things alike in his favor.

"Thanks, Gen; we'll try next time." It's only one of their first sessions, but there's progress already being made. Genevieve pats Jared's arm, before walking over to her desk, leaving Jared to head over to Chris' area to collect Jensen. Kane is sketching something, sticking his tongue out in mock concentration, causing Jensen to crack crooked smiles and laugh quietly as the sketcher does his talent. Both younger men look up when Jared's footsteps are heard, and Jensen waves half-heartedly. Jared smiles crookedly, nodding at Kane, before standing next to Jensen's chair.

"Ready to go?" nodding, Jensen stands, quietly telling Kane goodbye before fetching his coat from Jared's office. Genevieve gives both of them a hug before they leave, professionalism be damned. "See you soon, boys," Gen smiles, as they walk out the door.

******

Jensen always loves the ride from the precinct back home. Besides the fact they get stuck in traffic every damn time, the boy likes to admire the architecture of the buildings and huge skyscrapers. The water in which the city is near, and the skies. But whenever Jensen drives back home with his father, his most favorite time to do that is when it's dark out. He's never seen that many lights; all of them different shapes and shades and sizes. Some glowing bright, others dim. Blinking lights of advertisements or open signs, or the dim glow of skyscrapers as the light gradually moves upwards the higher the building.

Time always flies by faster when Jensen admires the lights. He gets caught up in them. And although it's not nearly dark enough right now to see as many as he'd like, the mid-afternoon, nine-to-five working average Joe traffic gives him just enough time to admire the few that are actually out. Dad promised him that one day soon, on a day off, he'd take Jensen out to every high building they could get to, to see all the bright lights at a higher destination.

Soon the traffic and bright lights of bustling New York turn more soft and mellow with the more country-side, suburbs part of the state. Jared's pulling into the drive as Jensen finally tears his green eyes away from the window.

"Got your stuff?" he asks. He'd been watching Jensen through the corner of his eye during the traffic and lonely ride back home, and can't help if his voice or eyes turn out fond. It's good to see his son relax at something so simple. At something he could see everyday. It soothed Jensen, so therefore it soothed Jared's never-ending nerves. As Jensen undoes his seatbelt, Jared's already exiting the car and making his way to the front door, unlocking it before Jensen can even shut his own door. Walking down the rocky gravel drive with ease, the police officer then grabs his own bag from where Jensen set it on the ground. With it now hitched over his shoulder and Jensen's form moving towards the house with forced casualness, Jared enters the house.

Jensen's still always tense and on guard when he enters the house, and usually ends up crashing on the couch with Harley and Sadie curled up next to him. As if to protect him better than they did last time. Even though they did their best.

"What do you want to eat?" Jared calls into the living room, putting away his firearms, and undoing the stupid tie he has to wear. He hates ties; always muttering about them as if they came from the devil himself. Jensen is always amused. Setting some groceries in the fridge, and taking some things out to make some dinner, Jared glances back at Jensen when he realizes his question has gone unanswered.

"Jen?" hazel eyes hold a questioning gaze as they turn to meet green, but they never meet. Because now- Jared should really get used to Jensen moving so quietly- the boy is at the window facing the road in the kitchen. Right to the left of the sink, and to the left of where Jared was standing right then. Jared holds in his shocked curse and jump of surprise that he didn't notice Jensen sooner, and instead nudges the boy's slim shoulder.

"Jen? What're you.." the Texan giant trails off, however, as he hears a car pull in to his driveway, gravel and dust making themselves known as they crunch under the tires. Jared goes behind Jensen's still form, ducking his head so it's next to Jensen's. So he can get a good look out the window.

A silver, 2006 Toyota Camry.

_Oh. Jesus. Fuck._

As always, the dogs perk up as their advanced ears hear the car as well, and they both make a mad dash for the door to see who's coming to visit. _But they both shy away the second they get visuals of the car._ But more importantly, when they see the _driver_.

"Dad, why's she here?" Jensen asks quietly, shaky hands already gripping Jared's muscular arm, big green eyes piercing into his eyes like a knife through his heart. Jensen thinks he doesn't want him. He thinks after all of this, Jared doesn't want him anymore. And when Jared looks at the calendar, he realizes why.

It's the end of the second month.

******

Sandra McCoy has worked many cases in her life working for CPS. Her mother worked for them, as well as her grandmother, so she figured, why the hell not? With no father around Sandra figured she'd much rather take after her mother's side of the family than her father's. And so she went to work, graduating high-school with a good GPA and going o college to learn how to do what she aspired to be. Time flies by and then suddenly she's an agent for the Child Protection Agency. Making her mother proud, and hopefully her grandmother- who had sadly passed away before she could see her only grandchild succeed in the so called 'family business'.

She's nearing thirty, with a good reputation and a high-class job at being one of the best in her fields. So yes, Sandra McCoy has worked many cases during her involvement of CPS.

But she's never had a case like Jensen Ackles'.

A young boy who started getting abused before he could even tie his own shoes, let alone say a word as long as his arm. Sandra's worked abuse cases, even homicide cases before. The worst abuse cases she thought she'd ever see. Until Jensen's. Until Jensen's case file was slapped down on her desk one fateful Thursday morning, she thought she'd seen it all.

Opening up his file that day, with her stone-cold poker face intact, (she'd learned not to show emotion, it being easier to hide than not feel it at all), she didn't expect to actually see _six_ files in that one, huge manila envelope.

Sandra didn't expect to see a medical record for the boy, starting from the day he was born until now, filled with injuries like bruises, burns, broken bones, fractures, concussions, internal bleeding, malnutrition and dehydration, and even surgeries for severe injuries done to his lungs and heart. Pierced lung, broken ribs that are cutting it too close to his lungs. Almost everything you could physically do to a person, was on this boy's list.

His personal record was good by most standards. He never got in trouble at school, picked on once in a while but he himself never started a fight. Great grades, nearly all A's. But the profile picture shows a boy that looks so unhappy Sandra can _feel_ it through the paper and into her heart. His eyes- gosh, so green..- show unhappiness, loneliness, pain. But none of those stand out as much as the fear does. Oh dear god how that much fear was in that boy's eyes in that one little torn picture.

She wont ever admit it to her coworkers, or even her boss, but the second she got home that night, even bringing the case home to work on, she cried. Cried for the little boy who had no one to go to when HE needed help. When he needed love or support, who did he go to? Definitely not his mother, or any of her friends. And what about his father for Christ's sake? That's when Ms. McCoy started going over his DNA. Looking for the father, or any other living relative this poor boy could go to.

When she found one Jared Tristan Padalecki, Sandra bent the rules a little, and instead of letting some CPS worker from New York handle questioning Mr. Padalecki, she herself offered- at her own expense- to fly out and ask him questions. She wasn't going to approve of this man because some stupid  _fax_ said he was A-Okay.

Meeting Jared Padalecki went better than she expected. The woman was expecting some kind of selfish comment, maybe even some crude question of whether or not the state would pay for Jensen. But he didn't. He seemed shocked Ms. Reed hadn't told him about being pregnant- with his child. Padalecki was kinda of shocked-out for the first few minutes of her speech, but he finally snapped out of it long enough to shake her hand in his bigger one, and say he'd take on the task for the two months she offered.

 _"I'll leave you a week to get ready for him."_ She'd already been back at her office when Jared had called her back, and if she was honest, she was having doubts about him taking his son in. The way he cut it close to call her. But somehow, she knew. Call it an expert feeling, or maybe even a 'gut feeling', but Sandra McCoy knew this man would work out for the task at hand.

So now, as she walks up the driveway to the house she'd dropped Jensen off at two months ago, she feels herself get emotional at what it is she has to do. Jared did everything right in her mind. He took care of Jensen, gave him everything he needed, and even asked for a copy of the legal guardian papers for part of Jensen's Christmas present, for that month that always seems to be around the corner. Jared called her and said he'd like to remain Jensen's guardian, just like Sandra said he should if he wants to keep guardianship of the boy. He did everything right.

But apparently someone didn't think so. Because just a few days ago she received word from her boss that Jensen needed to come back to San Antonio, and go into the foster care system. At first, Ms. McCoy had thought Jared had died, or something terrible. But because her boss got wind of the situation concerning Jensen back at the hands of his old captures, including his mother, they felt that living with his father wasn't a safe idea, because if they found Padalecki as simple as they did, who knows how easy it would be to take him again? And this time kill him? Sandra called absolute bullshit on that, in fact she fought with her boss and the law for weeks. Trying to convince them that with Jared, Jensen would be the safest he'd ever been and be.

The System didn't seem to think of it this way. And now- at her job's expense- she has to bring Jensen back home. Put this poor boy in the system, and pray to everything she knows that he'll make it back to Jared Padalecki.

"I sent in those papers, Ms. McCoy." Jared's stern voice and southern twang snap her out of her thoughts, and she looks up to see the police man walking towards her, a mixed variety of emotions going across his face. Confusion, concern, fear, and even anger. Sandra doesn't blame him.

"I'm aware," she says, taking a shaky breath. Out of the corner of her eye, she sees thirteen year old Jensen at the door, ready to come outside out of frightened curiosity. Jared sees him too, and does something with his hands, that seems to be some kind of code for 'go upstairs'. Because- after a few minutes of hesitation- he slowly walks away from the window and door, and soon out of sight.

"Mr. Padalecki," she starts, swallowing a few times to get the sudden lump out of her throat, and the emotions under control.

"Mr. Padalecki, I'm afraid Jensen needs to come with me."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SEMI-IMPORTAN IN CASE YOU ARE ARTISTIC AND BORED OR ETC. I have not been able to find a good picture that represents Jared if he was a cop, mostly because my computer is terrible! XD so if any of you have ever found a good representation of what Jared might look like in this fic, PLEASE send me a link or tell me how to find it! Same with Jensen, too, although my main concern in Jared. Just, PLEASE. I WILL FOREVER BE IN YOUR DEBT.


	24. Chapter 24

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so sorry for such a long delay! Between school and testing it kind of got a little hectic. Hope you guys had a great holiday during January and February, and hopefully y'all will like this chapter

Jared takes a shaky breath, running a hand through his freshly combed hair as he stands before a court room in San Antonio, Texas. He's been fighting this case for weeks, but never got any more than an apology letter from the stupid people who took Jensen away from him for 'safety reasons'. He'd flown down for the hearing nearly a week and a half earlier, so he could prepare for it all. Chad flew down with him early that Sunday morning, helping him get evidence and statements to prove that Jensen is safest when he's with his father.

So far, they were doing pretty good. But it wasn't what Jared was worried about. Jared was worried about, even if he did gather enough people to testify and evidence to prove he is right, the CPS STILL wouldn't find him qualified to be a good guardian for Jensen. He's been to court cases before for work, and so many times someone he thought was guilty walked, or a child went to the wrong parent.

Jared is scared that will happen to him.

"All rise for the Honorable Judge Vantoch." Jared's torn from his thoughts as he watches Judge Vantoch take her seat, before they all sit down again. She's a middle aged woman with dark brown hair and eyes, glasses and a too kind look to be a judge, Jared thinks. He and Chad had done research on everybody they could that would be a part of this case. She was on the top of their list.

_"Who's next?" Jared had asked, searching through the information found on the court. Chad sits across from him, already going through his laptop for information._

_"The Honorable Victoria Vantoch; she'll be judging your case," Chad announces, before looking up at Jared. "She usually works abuse cases for kids, so this can go either way for you, Jay-rod." Jared nods, running a hand through his hair. "What else is there to know, Chad?"_

_"She doesn't go easy on abusive people, whether or not their age, or if they are the parents or not. She doesn't go soft, or so they say. She's known for being soft for the kids though, and since this douchebag lawyer-guy is having Jensen go to the stand..." Jared growls a bit at that, still very much pissed off that the man trying to take his son away from him is making Jensen take the stand. The police officer knows that it is kind of essential for the case that the boy the case is about say what he thinks and knows, but Jared doesn't have to like it. He knows his son, and knows for a fact that this man is going to play at Jensen's weaknesses when it comes to his past and what happened at the house._

Sitting behind him is Chad, Chris, Genevieve, and Kripke. His parents, and siblings are there right next to Sherri, their own spouses on the other side. Neither Megan, or even Jeff's wife and Megan's husband, have even talked to Jensen. Not even in a phone call. But they're here to help in any way they can.

And Jared couldn't be more thankful.

"Your call, Mr. Collins," Judge Vantoch says, turning to Jared's lawyer, Misha Collins. Genevieve's current boyfriend. Jared owes her, big time. No matter what she says, he's still buying her flowers when all this is over.

"I'd like to call Jared Padalecki to the stand, if I may," Misha Collins is a lawyer with quick wit and a sharp tongue. After meeting Genevieve, he was soon meeting the entire precinct she worked at. And after meeting Jared, the lawyer was both for sure that if he ever hurt Gen- intentional or no- he was going to be easily thrown into the Hudson River. He was also aware that Jared's son was possibly one of the coolest kids he'd ever heard of.

He hadn't even met the boy yet, but from what he had heard, Misha liked him. He'd be like the nephew he never had but always wanted. Shy and slightly introverted, but obviously smart and sarcastic by the way Jared talks about him. The fond look he gets whenever someone mentions his son, it's obvious to Misha that this boy is Jared's world. And he only met his son a few weeks ago.

So when he got a tearful call from Genni a few days ago, telling him everything while trying to hold back tears, he knew that without a doubt this was a bullshit case. He couldn't believe that anyone would think for a split second that Jensen was safer without Jared.

So Misha is going to win this case, no matter what.

******

Jensen has been sitting here for hours. He doesn't even know where the hell he is. It's a nice room, with comfortable chairs and a couch, books on the walls and a lamp causing a dim but warm glow from the corner of the room. There was a judge in here earlier. He watched enough  _Law and Order_   to know what a judge looked like, or at least what they wore. She'd been in the familiar black robes, but her face wasn't the hardened mask they usually were. She was kind and even made him smile- even if it was a fake smile.

He just wanted to go home. Wanted to see his dad, stay home without having to worry about anything anymore. Jensen had cried when his Dad told him Ms. Sandra had arrived at their house to take him away.

_"No." Jensen backs away a bit from his father, who just walked in to his room to tell him what Ms. McCoy was doing here. He shakes his head again, looking up at Jared. In return, his father takes a step towards him, before sighing. He opens his mouth to speak, but Jensen beats him to it, panic rising into his throat._

_"Please don't make me go back, please," Jensen can feel his father's eyes on him, but he can't stop. Not now._

_"I can be better, I.. I'll stop having nightmares, or.. waking you up," Jensen didn't know what to offer, what to do to get his father to change his mind. He thought they were doing better. He thought HE was being better and now-_

_"Hey, breathe Jensen, just breathe.." he didn't realize how close his father had gotten until he's pressed up against Jared's warm chest, a hand carding through his shorter hair with a shaking hand._

_"I didn't call her, she just showed up on her own. Kiddo, look at me," Jared kneels down, hands now on Jensen's shoulders. Hazel and green looking right at each other._

_Both filled with tears neither will shed._

_"I need you to go with her, okay?" Jensen's tears fall down his face, his eyes unable to hold them all. "Just for a few days, and then I'm gonna get you back, I promise." Jared's bigger hand lifts his face up gently, his other wiping away the tears falling from Jensen's face._

_"I promise. I'm gonna come back and get you, alright? And then we'll come home." Taking a shaky breath as more tears fill his eyes, Jared pulls the boy into a tight hug, hand cupping the back of Jensen's head so he rests against his shoulder and chest tightly._

_"I promise. I love you, Jen. I promise I won't let you go. I promise..."_

Before he knows it, Jensen has tears in his eyes again, quickly wiping them away with the sleeve of his sweatshirt. Just as soon as he gets himself under control, there's a knock at the door, before a man with a uniform on comes into the room quietly. He smiles at Jensen, as if realizing this is a stressful time for the boy to be in. 

"You ready?" the man asks, holding the door open wide enough for Jensen to walk past him, heading for what the boy can only guess be the court room. Jensen only nods at the question, not saying yes, or no. He knows for a fact he isn't ready. Not even close enough to being slightly ready. But even if he said no, this officer of the court wouldn't be able to do anything about it. Jensen would still have to go out there, and face the judge, and the jury. His father, who he hasn't seen in weeks. 

So he just nods, letting the man lead him out of the office and through another door, into a room where there are a lot of people. But the thirteen year old only has his eyes trained on one.

Dad.


	25. Chapter 25

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so, so, SO sorry for not updating in so long. I guess I was just putting it off, and then lost track of time. I will try to be better I promise! School will be out in a few weeks, so hopefully I'll be able to update sooner. So sorry guys.

Jensen sits next to Sandra McCoy, who had come down to watch the case unroll. She'd been assigned to represent the Child Services, and the reasons they took Jensen away, even though she thought it was the wrong decision. The teenager scratches nervously at the collar of his suit, hating the Texan weather even within the walls of the courthouse. His father is up at what Sandra had told him was called, 'the stand'. Where people on witness lists or people with good evidence and cold, hard facts would sit and tell their side of the story.

She had tried to help him prepare for as much as she could, but even being the representative for their side of the case, she was still only allowed to know so much. Ms. McCoy had, however, been able to tell Jensen how sorry she was that she had to do this; how she had to take Jensen away from his father and then speak in front of all the people of the court. Jensen had told her it wasn't her fault, more than once. He wanted to be mad at her, yell and kick up a fuss because she was the only one that was around now. But his heart just wouldn't let him. Jensen knew it wasn't her fault.

"Mr. Padalecki," a dark haired man in a finely tailored suit says, turning Jensen's thoughts away from Ms. Sandra and back to his father in the hot seat. Jensen knows who Misha is, and has no doubt in his mind that this is him. Genevieve had showed him pictures when he saw her for therapy lessons sometimes. Only when his head was in a bad spot. Misha turned a bit, and saw the cerulean eyes she'd been talking about. The ones that she had said, 'drawn' her to him.

"Would you mind telling us how you came to have guardianship of your son?" Jensen watches as his father shifts in his seat, to get close to the microphone. He's also in a suit, hair brushed away from his eyes so he looks a bit more professional. Jensen can see the faint, dark circles around his eyes, from sleepless nights. Jensen doesn't have to look in a mirror to know that he as them, too.

Soon enough, Jared starts to talk, telling his answer to the question.

******

"... And I agreed to take him in for a probation period of two months," Jared finishes, letting out a shaky breath when he does. He looks at Misha rather than the jury, too nervous to see their expressions. Misha has a crooked grin on his face, just for Jared to know he did good.

"And when you first met Jensen, how did he act?" Misha asks, even though he already knew the story. The Jury didn't though, so he was going to lay it on thick, so these people can see they made a huge mistake with taking Jensen away.

"He was.. shy. Quiet, barely ever talked," Jared answers, swallowing as he remembers those first few weeks. "He was scared of his own shadow..-"

"Objection your honor." The prick on the other side, interrupts Jared's words, standing up and fixing his tie as he does. Everyone looks at him, some glaring, others raising their eyebrows in thought as to what this guy was doing. His name was Curtis Armstrong, and was defending the CPS of their actions. He was a total asshole in Jared's book and he didn't even know him. But when he catches glimpses of Sandra McCoy's glare and Misha's exasperated huff, Jared thinks that his thoughts on this guy are correct.

"Witness doesn't know what the boy was thinking, or even what he was really scared of." Armstrong says, looking at Vantoch.

"Overruled, but next time try to refrain from suspecting what the boy was thinking, Mr. Padalecki," the judge says softly, before telling Armstrong to sit down, and for Misha to continue.

"Mr. Padalecki, could you tell me how Jensen acted around you a few weeks into your new relationship with him? Was he as shy, or as withdrawn as he was when you guys first met?" Misha asks, and Jared shakes his head before answering verbally.

"No, he was always shy. That's just who he is, but he talked more, didn't jump as much when I came into a room. He didn't drop a conversation as much," Jared risks a glance at Jensen, who looks too pale, and the dark rings under his eyes only highlight that. So he hadn't been getting much sleep either, Jared thinks. He wonders if the folks at Child Services knew what to do when Jensen had a nightmare. If they knew he didn't like talking about it with anyone but Genevieve. And if you yelled at him to wake up it would only make the dreaming worse. He knew all of that, as Jensen's father he couldn't help but to wonder if Jensen had at least told Sandra any of that.

"And did Jensen ever tell you what his childhood was like?" Jared grimaces as Jensen tenses up on the other side of the room, looking at Jared with slightly broken green eyes.

"Yes, he did," Jared answers, clasping and unclasping his hands in his lap, where no one could see. So nobody could call him out on being nervous.

"Thank you, Jared. I'm done with this witness now," Misha says to Judge Vantoch, before going back to his chair, the one next to him empty and reserved for when Jared sits back down.

"Your witness, Mr. Armstrong." As Curtis Armstrong was preparing, Jared thought back to what Misha had warned him of before all of this started.

_"Number one, Jared; don't be afraid to look at the Jury. Not looking at the might come off as suspicious to them, and the lawyer against us."_

Jared would look at the first few jurors, but no longer than a minute or so. To him that was enough time for each answer he gave them.

_"Two. I won't ask you as many questions in the first day of the trial as I will in the second." Misha looks at him. "That way Jensen doesn't have to deal with everything in one day, and the people will remember more the second day than the first."_

Taking a deep breath as Armstrong heads his way, Jared remembers the last thing Misha told him, right before the judge came in to get the trial started.

_"Last one, and maybe the most important, Jared; don't lose your temper, any of you," Misha doesn't only look at Jared, but also at his parents and the few members of the precinct that showed up for the trial. "Please don't. It will look better, if you don't. And I doubt any of you suckers brought two hundred dollars ready to hand in if one of you get charged with contempt." Jared choked out a laugh then, as did the others. It broke the tension everyone had been carrying since the day Jensen got taken away, and they needed it just as Judge Vantoch entered the room._


	26. Chapter 26

"Mr.... Padalecki," Armstrong says, obviously having trouble with the name. Jared only just suppressed an eye-roll. 

"Did Jensen ever say his past was a difficult time?" Jared shifts in his seat, clearing his throat. 

"Yes. When he told me about his mother and her... Friends," Armstrong makes a dismissive sound in the back of his throat. Out of the corner of his eye, Jared sees Jensen roll his eyes. Armstrong paces in front of him. 

"Did Jensen tell you that he wanted to continue living with you? At any time during his stay?"   

"Yes. He did a few times throughout his stay with me," Jared says, eyeing this guy warily. He's just... Weird. 

"No further questions, your honor," the short lawyer looks pissed he can't find anything out of the ordinary, as he sits back down next to Sandra McCoy. She scoots away from him, and Jensen ignores everything the guy does. Judge Vantoch glances at Jared, then to Misha. 

"Would you like to question this witness further, Mr. Collins?" Misha smiles wryly, but shakes his head as he stands. 

"Free to sit down, Mr. Padalecki," she says, and as Jared heads for his seat, he can hear Misha talk to the room. 

"I'd like to ask Jensen a few questions, if that's alright." Jared knew that Jensen wasn't aware he'd need to talk to the jury on stand. Hell, Jared himself was barely alright with it until Misha and Genevieve told him it's a better way to get the jury on his side rather than CPS. So he agreed. 

"Jensen, if you'll please come up to the stand," the Judge says softly, as Misha leads Jensen up to the hot-seat. Jared lets out a breath he didn't realize he'd been holding. 

He prays and hopes and prays again that this will end up in his favor. 

******

Mr. Collins was polite enough not to shoot a question immediately after a question. Jensen was greatful for that. He asked questions Jensen REALLY didn't want to answer, but Jensen knew he had to. The teenager didn't look at anyone really, either at his hands clasping and unclasping on his lap, or towards his dad. Jared was staring at him with gentle eyes Jensen has come to recognize from miles away. By the time Misha finishes questioning him, Jensen feels like this isn't as bad as he thought. 

"I'd like to keep Jensen on the stand, please," Armstrong says suddenly, and Jensen changes his mind. He's wondering if this guy is oblivious to his father's glares or if he just doesn't care. Jensen can't decide if he wants to know. 

"Jensen, why didn't you ever fight back against your mother?" Jensen looks at him, hands clenching in his lap. 

"I was afraid," he says slowly, not knowing how to answer that. 

"Afraid of what?" Armstrong prompts. 

"Of her. Of her friends," Jensen says, staring at his lap. "Of what they might do to me." 

******

Jared's fists clench on their own accord, his jaw in a tight lock as he listens to this douchebag's questions and his son's quiet answers. 

Misha's a hand on Jared's knee, so he won't outburst or rush to punch this guy in the face. 

"Would you say you were scared because you were too weak to fight back?"

"Ob-"

"Jec-!"

"Tion-!"

Jared is kind of shocked that he and Misha, as well as Ms. McCoy shout the word at the same time. Jensen looks like he's been slapped, eyes wide and face pale. He looks sick. Armstrong looks smug and Judge Vantoch looks like she'd rather be anywhere else than here. 

"Sustained. Mr. Armstrong I suggest to rethink your words before you say them. I won't warn you again." He holds his hands up in an innocent gesture with a wry smile. 

Jared would LOVE to arrest him. After breaking every bone in his body. Twice. 


	27. Chapter 27

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Guys I got a new computer! This means faster updates!

Jensen watches everyone warily, looking around the court room. His father is giving death glares to Mr. Armstrong, and if looks could kill, well...

Ms. Sandra seems to be looking for something inside her briefcase, ignoring everything else. Misha is writing furiously across his note sheets, blue eyes scrunched up in concentration. Out of the corner of his eye, Jensen sees Sherry looking at him. She catches his eye, and smiles at him warmly. It makes Jensen smile back, giving him a bit more hope that everything will turn out in his favor. 

Mr. Armstrong catches the look. Sherry looks disgusted as the short man starts up again. 

"Now Jensen, is it true your grandparents are here today?" The court house goes quiet as the questioning starts up again, all small talk being forgotten nearly immediately. Jensen raises an eyebrow. "Yeah, I'm pretty sure they're here." he says wryly, unable to keep the snark from his voice. He sees Jared crack a grin, and the other lawyer narrow his eyes a bit. Jensen's had enough of this case, and it's barely been two hours. He's tired of people assuming his father is a bad parent, and that he's better off in some random person's care. Hundreds of miles away from the one person who finally made him feel like he had a family, and was loved. 

"Mr. Ackles I suggest you-" Armstrong has been a lawyer for many years. Nearly 25, to be exact. Not many people like him but that's just the way it goes when you're a lawyer. Not many people like you and in honesty he likes it that way. Curtis has had many shocks in his career. Like the first time he won a case, and then when he lost one after a long-time winning streak. He'd been surprised when after only five years in his firm, he was made a partner. Beating other lawyers who- by the looks of it- had been there since before he was born.

But Curtis Armstrong has never been as surprised as he is now, as he watches the Ackles boy rise from the stand, glaring at him and shaking his head. Jensen ignores Armstrong's spluttered command of 'sit down'.

"No. _I_ suggest  _you_  leave me alone with all these questions." Jensen snaps at him, green eyes filled with frustration and anger. "You insult my life, my father, my family, all because you're trying to win a case that shouldn't even exist!" Judge Vantoch says his name, eyes filled with concern and gentleness. Jensen ignores her too. 

******

Jared watched with surprised eyes as his son stands up, starting to crack under the pressure and stress of the case. Under the worry of being taken away and unprotected. Misha puts his hand on Jared's arm, to stall the Texan's movements to get up and go to the boy. At Jared's incredulous look, Misha shakes his head, not removing his arm.

"He needs to do this," the lawyer watches Jensen run a hand through his hair, his rant to Armstrong not finished yet.

"And you people take me away from my family because you think I'm safer without them? That's one of the stupidest things I've ever heard! My father is a cop! My uncle is a doctor! I couldn't be with anyone safer!" Jensen takes a steady breath, eyeing Armstrong, who is now holding his hands out as if to say 'don't hurt me'. Well, tough, Jensen thinks absently, because I'm not finished yet.

"You asked me what I was afraid of, Mr. Armstrong," Jensen says, voice steady yet quiet. Almost eerily calm considering all the yelling he'd been doing just moments ago. "You thought it was because I was too weak to fight back."

Jensen steps away from the stand, facing the older man only a few feet away. There's a small smile on Jensen's face, wry yet bittersweet. Jared watches as his son shrugs a bit, looking around as he tries to find the right words to say. Green eyes pierce into grey when he does. 

"I wasn't afraid of what they'd do to me, if I told somebody. I wasn't too weak, or too ashamed," the smile never leaves Jensen's face. Even as he finishes.

"I didn't tell anybody because I was afraid of being _alone_."

******

It's absolutely silent in the building. Even the shorthand reporter has stopped the scratchy scrawl of her pencil on paper. Jensen just calmly sits back down next to Ms. McCoy, who herself is watching him with awe in her face. Jensen looks content with what he said, sitting at his seat, hands clasped together in a relaxed way. He glances at Jared, who is staring at him with a million emotions flying across his face in a matter of seconds. The boy smiles at him a bit, nodding in an unspoken confirmation. 

 _I'm okay._  

And when Jared's million emotions turn into a single one of just relief, and nods back before looking at Misha and talking to him in low tones. Jensen knows what his father is saying.

 _I believe you._  

 


	28. Chapter 28

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oh wow guys... it has been way too long! I am SO Sorry.

It's quiet in the courtroom, Jensen having been taken back to Judge Vantoch's chambers while there was a recess. Jared was standing outside the open door to the courtroom, biting his nail as he listened to the minor activity going through the halls he was currently pacing. Misha was talking to the judge, while Mr. Armstrong was sitting at his seat, staring at his hands, and occasionally his papers on this case. 

"Mind if I join you?" Jared looks up, to see Sandra McCoy standing a few feet from him, sheepish smile on her face in greeting. He shrugs, sliding to the right of the wall so there's room for her to lean against it next to him. 

"That boy of yours sure is something," she says, glancing at him. Sandra watches him, the way he's hunched over in the shoulders, yet still tense. Like he's trying not to make his presence known. Jared's brown hair is behind his ears, combed back to the best of his abilities while still managing to run his hands through it. He doesn't look like a cop here, she realizes. Here, he just looks like Jared Padalecki, concerned father. 

"Yes ma'am; sure is is something special," Jared murmurs, fondness thick in his voice. Sandra feels a light pang of guilt, knowing it is partly her fault that they have to be here today, rather than relaxing after everything they've been through. 

"Mr. Padalecki, I'm-" 

"Don't." He speaks quietly, but firm enough that she actually does as he says. She stares at him, waiting for him to say more. He does. 

"I don't want you to feel bad, even it is is somehow your fault," Jared looks at her. "So long as I get my boy back, it doesn't matter."

******

In all her years of being in law cases, from a lawyer to a judge, Victoria Vantoch has never seen a case quite like this one. She's seen her fair share of abuse cases, custody battles, and everything in between. Or so she'd thought. Jensen wasn't like any boy she'd ever met during a case. Quiet yet strong, and not afraid to make his opinion matter to the people of the jury. 

Make it matter to her. 

Don't get involved. Don't get emotionally or physically involved. Some of the most important rules for anyone working in the criminal justice system. It's practically step one of wanting to become someone in this line of work. 

If that's the case here, then she failed step one. 

Making her way back to her chambers after a short discussion with Mr. Collins, she opens her door to find Jensen sitting where he had before the case had begun. Hands clasped together, foot tapping erratically on the carpeted floor in a fast, nervous pace. Shutting her door carefully, she makes her way to her desk, across from Jensen. 

"I've gotta say," Vicki starts, glancing at Jensen, who is now staring at her with a wry smile. She didn't think he was going to talk to her, let alone realize she was there. 

"Mr. Armstrong sure is a dick." Huffing out a surprised laugh, the judge glances at the boy who is looking at her with the same smile, as if he hadn't just badmouthed an adult in front of someone he maybe shouldn't have. Green eyes sparkling with amusement, Jensen leans back in the armchair, still looking at her, before diverting his attention back to his tapping foot. 

"I'm going to have to agree with you on that one," Vicki says lightly, letting out an airy laugh before shuffling some files on her desk, placing them away in a drawer for her to deal with later. 

For now, she thinks her and Jensen here are entitled to speak their minds about Mr. Armstrong.

After all, it is off the record. 

******

"Well, I must say that this case has been a wild ride from start to finish. But luckily, we are getting to the end of it." Jensen swallows harshly, staring at his hands on the tabletop, next to Ms. McCoy once again as the recess had ended. They've come up with the rules, the final say as to who he is going to go home with. 

He hadn't felt nervous in the chambers of Judge Vantoch, but he's definitely feeling nervous now, back out where he has to face the facts, even if they aren't the ones he wants to hear. 

"Since this is Texas, we have a few rules when it comes to custody cases that other places don't always have," the judge continues, glancing at papers on her desk, but not touching the white envelope the people had given her. The envelope with the answer to his future inside. 

"We are the only state that includes a jury for court cases, but that does not mean we make the final hearsay. For one, past counts of neglect and mistreatment are to be brought up again, as well as the fact that neither a judge like myself, nor the jurors are able to mess with what had been temporary after this case." She finishes there, glancing up through her glasses to take a look at everyone.

"On that note, shall we?"

Her hand grabs the envelope, tearing it open and unfolding the light yellow papers inside. They look lighter in the rays of her desk lamp, but sadly nobody can read what is written on the papers from where they are sitting.

"In this case, Padalecki versus the Child Protection Services for the custody of Jensen Ross Ackles, son to Jared Tristan Padalecki and Darcy Alexandria Ackles-Reed, I read that the custody of this boy goes to.."

She reads down the page a little more, opening her mouth. 

Jared looks down, hands shaking bad enough that he clasps them together so hard his knuckles turn white. Sherry grabs her husband's hand tightly. From across the room, Jensen's hand is being held tightly in Sandra's grasp as well.

Nobody breathes as she starts to speak. 


	29. Chapter 29

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright guys! We're starting to come to an end here with FoaC, but I've been thinking of doing a few little one-shots set after this story ends. What do you guys think? I'm also going to be open to story suggestions in the comments if you guys would like one.

A second is all it takes to determine something in your life. Whether the decision is big or small, it could end up deciding something for you in the future. Jensen has this thought in mind as Judge Vantoch reads aloud the final verdict. 

".. the custody of this boy goes to..." Jensen holds his breath, hanging on tightly to Ms. Sandra's hand, which had somehow gotten intertwined with his. 

" _Jared Padalecki_." Nobody says or done anything, frozen as they process what this means. Mr. Armstrong leaves silently, taking a loss when given to him, no matter how badly he thought he would win. When the courtroom door shuts as he disappears, people are snapped out of their reverie. 

Jensen moves first. 

******

Jared sits numbly next to Misha, listening and watching the words come out of the Judge's mouth. But he still can't find it in himself to move yet. Jensen gets to stay with him. He gets his  _son_ back. Jensen-

Jared finally looks up when he hears a chair scraping across the floor, and sees Jensen standing up. Jared stands up as well, adrenaline giving one last act as he meets Jensen halfway; lifting him clear off the ground and hugging him tightly. Jensen's arms are around his neck, hanging on just as tightly as Jared is. Distantly, he can hear Judge Vantoch dismiss the court, and the few people who were there for the CPS leave, as well as the jury, but Jared just hangs on to his son. 

The Texan giant feels a hand on his shoulder, and pulls back just enough so he can see his mother standing next to him, eyes shining happily and smiling widely. 

"You did it, JT; you got your boy back," she says gently, and Jared can't help but to huff out a wet laugh, carefully letting Jensen down. The boy stays close, despite being crowded around by their friends and family. 

Even while being surrounded though, Jensen finds a crack in the crowd just long enough to send Jared that blinding smile, wide enough to take up his entire face, and eyes shining with delight like the sun. 

Jared just smiles back just as happily, dimples popping in his cheeks. 

******

"Congratulations, boys," Sandra McCoy is waiting by the exit, briefcase leaning against her legs. Her brown hair is tied back to get it out of the way, and her light hazel eyes are twinkling with slight amusement, but overall joy. 

Jensen's under his father's arm, that thousand-watt smile still in place. Jared's work friends ended up leaving a little while ago, following Jared's parents to a restaurant to celebrate the massive win. 

"Ma'am," Jared nods with a grin, and Sandra, for a moment, is frozen with just how happy he looks. When they first met, he seemed almost empty. Now, he looks complete with his son at his side. 

Sandy doesn't blame him one bit. 

"You're welcome to join us in celebrating," Jared tells her, chin gesturing towards the exit. Jensen nods, hands on Jared's massive arm around him.

"I'd love to boys, but maybe another time. I've sadly taken more time off than I should've," It isn't a lie. She was given the three days for the court case. The day before, and the two days of. It was one of the fastest cases she's ever been to. 

But she took two weeks off, to give Jared the information she was authorized to give. 

"I hope to see you soon, but under better circumstances," Sandy smiles at them, holding a hand out. Jared takes it, squeezing for a second as he shakes it. 

"Likewise," he murmurs. 

******

They go to a local little restaurant, connecting a few tables together in order to get enough room. There are five on each side. Jared is at the first end of the right side, followed by Jeff, Megan, Sherri, and Gerry. Across from the giant police officer is Jensen, Chris, Chad, Genevieve, Misha. Kripke headed back to New York shortly after the decision was made. He shook Jared's hand, ruffled Jensen's hair, before leaving. Megan and Jeff's spouses had taken off too, to pick up their respective children.

Misha's attention is split between Sherri's questions and Genevieve, while Chris and Jensen are doodling on the back of their place-mats. Chad is catching up with Mr. Padalecki, their conversation going from work to sports, and then back again. Jared is talking with Megan and Jeff mostly, all of them occasionally adding in to someone else's table discussion.

Everyone is relaxed, taking a moment to catch a breather from all the tense weeks they've had. Especially Jared and Jensen.

It quiets down once their food arrives, everyone busy with their plates than their company.

Jensen eats half of his plate, and even though his grandmother starts in on how he needs to eat more, Jared just gives his son an amused look. They had a deal back at home that he had to eat at least half of his plate, after he'd gotten out of the hospital. Jensen gives him a look for not helping him, but it ends up morphing into a smile.   

And Jared can't find it in himself to say anything, because at that moment, everything was perfect. 


	30. End

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guys I am so sorry it took this long, but here it is! The end of this story! It's been real, having all you lovely people comment and follow this story. Let me know if you want anything specific to read I'll try my best to help!

It's late by the time the boys get home; saying farewell to everyone after the celebration dinner and then the long drive back to Jared's house. 

Putting the car in park, Jared glances at Jensen to see him asleep in the passenger's seat- head resting against the cool glass of the window, quiet puffs of air coming from his mouth and making the window fog momentarily. Smiling crookedly, Jared grabs his and Jensen's bags, carefully getting out of the vehicle, before gently shaking Jensen awake by the shoulder. Green eyes snap open a second later, turning to the Texan giant tiredly.

"Home, Jen. Can finish sleeping inside," he laughs, waiting for Jensen to slowly get out of the truck before shutting the car door for him. Jensen unlocks the front door for them, toeing off his shoes as he turns on the light. Jared sets his wallet and keys down on the kitchen counter, kicking his shoes off and away. Setting the bags in the living room, Jared watches as Jensen runs a hand down his face, trying to hide his yawn when his hand covers his face. 

"You can go to bed, kiddo. It's been a long day," Jared murmurs, leaning against the wall of the living room, looking tired but fond. Jensen turns towards him, smiling crookedly. 

"It's been a good day." Winning the case and getting his dad back, getting the air of slight normality back, was the best part of the day for the teen. Happy to be home and around people he loves. And people he knows love him back just as fiercely. 

"Yeah, it has," Jared nods, smiling back at him. He walks forwards, ruffling Jensen's hair carefully while going to his bedroom. 

"It's late, we should get to bed, yeah? You okay to...?" Jared trails off. He trusts Jensen's alright. He really does. But fatherly instincts has him wanting to make sure his son will be alright by himself. He'll be right down the hall if Jensen needs him, but still. Jensen smiles a bit, nodding as he goes to follow Jared up the stairs, towards his own bedroom. 

"I'll be okay," he says, stopping to look at his father when they get to the top of the stairs. Jared's nodding, back to Jensen as he heads for his bedroom door, shoulders relaxed. And suddenly Jensen just... _has to._

"Dad?" As Jared turns, he's suddenly got an armful of Jensen, who has his arms tight around his father's waist, standing on his toes to be able to bury his face in Jared's shoulder. 

"I love you." Jared slowly puts his arms around Jensen, hugging back as the boy speaks, melting against him. Grinning, Jared sets one hand on the boy's back, the other on his head. 

"I love you too," and then they're pulling away, smiles and silent goodnights being said as they go to their rooms. 

******

It's the best night's sleep Jensen has had. It takes longer for Jared to fall asleep, but it's a peaceful one when he finally manages it. Jared had never imagined becoming a father, especially overnight, and with the twists and turns of the rollercoster that the two experienced. But for Jensen?

He'd do it all over again, to make his son happy. After all, isn't that what fatherhood is? 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And there it is. I feel like I could have ended this a lot better than I did, but I'm fairly happy with the result either way. I will hopefully back with another story soon, but I don't know if I am willing to post that one just yet. You guys have been great.


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